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29 September 2001
Visitor Comments:
(Submitted by sillyamy )
First Poster dance whoo hoo
*shaking booty* OH I see you
saved a WHOLE 39 cents on
something YOu can buy a Sams
Cola from the machine on your
way out the door. W-M Bath
Wal_marth Bath 24??? YOu can
take a bath there now?
hehehe Oh well enough of my
lame post I think Ill go take
the filter and and hide.
(Submitted by I have no fucking life and it pisses me off )
Sillyamy...I can see your
underwear. Wanna take a W-M
BATH 24HR?
(Submitted by UKBankerBoy )
3rd place, not bad for not
checking in for awhile.
(Submitted by 4th )
4th poster dance
(Submitted by lol@hotmail.com )
lol@hotmail.com
(Submitted by 6th )
6th poster dance
(Submitted by 7th )
7th poster dance
(Submitted by 498 )
8374908
(Submitted by 8th )
mesisng tis siht up
lol
lol.
(Submitted by COUNTERCARD )
WHAT IS A COUNTERCARD
(Submitted by Dalliance )
4th place...*4th place
wiggle* I am postitive I
could have been here earlier
but, like Chiqca said, we got
lost in Columbia. Bogota was
a bad scene after that rebel
drug lord took susie/susannah
hostage. Thank God, he only
wanted the banjo for ransom.
He seemed to have some strong
inclincation toward
instruments of the string
variety. We really didn't
understand it. Well, anyway,
thank GAWD we are back to
civilization. I DEFINITEY
need a W-B BATH 24R. Pronto!
(Submitted by Help )
I am a
(Submitted by Mick Jagger )
i can't get no
(ba da da)
girly action
i can't get no
(ba da da)
girly action
(Submitted by Lars Ulrich )
ARGGH! IM MEAN! AND I SHOW IT
CAUSE I WEAR BLACK! AND BLACK
IS A DARK COLOR!IPLAY DARK
MUSIC! GRRR I COULD KICK UR
ASS
(Submitted by oh my goodness )
imnot here
this isnt happe ning
(Submitted by Pee Wee Herman )
*streaks*
(Submitted by this )
when worlds collide
(Submitted by britney spears )
HELLO!!!! :):):):) IAM
BTITRNEY SPARS I REALLY AM I
AM HER TO PROMOTE MY NEW
SINGUL/SINGUHL/WHATEVERU
SPELL IT/SINGLA "IM A SLUT 4
U"
OK
THX
BYE!!11
BRIT S.
(Submitted by nicorette )
4 out of 5 dentists recommend
me
so bend over and geta taste
of whos in charge
(Submitted by chad )
o...k...
(Submitted by ok )
ok im done. sorry if i
offended anyone, im just
having fun. ciao :)
(Submitted by dragonzgaze )
Derek your losing your edge,
you have actually managed a
boring purchase, how is this
possible?? although that 39
cent savings is something
there, arent you glad you
bought the cheap knock off??
(Submitted by dragonzgaze )
chiq it was turn left at the
tire hanging from the tree,
and dont worry i left the
coffee beans as a trail for
you to get here. im still
waiting. *twiddling thumbs*
(Submitted by Andre )
*eyes smarting* Britney? Was
that really you? Hmm - Dally
- Britney - Dally - Britney,
so hard to decide
(Submitted by Justin )
Shut up Andre. God you're a
bore...here, shove this
FILTER up your ass, that'll
make you feel better.
Britney/Dally my ass.
Britney's a virgin y'know.
(Submitted by dragonzgaze )
wow Britney's a really touchy
subject, I had no idea. So I
guess now would be a bad time
to say I cant stand her and
think she has no talent?
(Submitted by Choosing is ever so hard...not )
Hmmm, I've never noticed Andre was a bore! It's
ever so good to know. BTW, he's not. For so long
i've thought I was the boring one. And antimoney...
just kidding there, hey, do you still email with
anton? Now that I have the monopoly on boring, i
just got some new socks for christmas, just say the
word and I'll describe them for you, they are nice.
(Submitted by the right bloke )
Go on ahead, Abi, tell dal how i'm the right bloke
for her. I love it when my British friends say that
phrase, say it for me...
(Submitted by Abi )
Do I know you??
(Submitted by susie )
*jumping up and down in the
bath* Yes together we stand!
thanks for not leaving me
with the Colombian rebels
girls, "Oh you guys
atWalmarts, dont you cry for
meeee, oh i come from
WISsssssssssCONSIiiiiiiN and
i sit on Dereks kneeeeee"
(Submitted by lieu )
kinda baffels the mind, eh
abi?
(Submitted by Abi )
Sure does lieu.....hey susie,
shame we lost the banjo,
but it was no contest, we
had to save our sus.
(Submitted by Joy Ryde )
hey susie girl - I hear if
you bring your quarters and
sit on Derek's knee you get
the ride of your life!
(Submitted by Abi )
ooh, now that sounds like
fun *swinging bag of
pennies 'round* Do you
take foreign currency D?
(Submitted by dal's never met a nicer bloke )
Hi dal.
(Submitted by Huh? )
hmmmmm. I have been sitting
pondering the
subtleties... ... the nuances
of this receipt. Bold, yet
quiet. Supportive of American
and yet he saves $.39. I
notice that it is a bit
crinkled and so I ask: BEEN
A' KEEPIN' THIS ONE IN YER
POCKET, EH DEREK?
(Submitted by Huh? )
And so I conclude that
receipts are much
like 'nanners: they can get
squished. << everybody clap
now for me >>
(Submitted by Huh? )
Hi Dal, can I borrow your "I
heart NY slutty skin-tight t-
shirt?" I might want to wear
it in my W-M Bath. Drives
the boys wild!
(Submitted by The Next Exciting Episode )
heywaitdontgodownthatroadHESAI
DLEFTATTHETIREENOTTHATROADtheb
ridgeisout...
(Submitted by Jesus LOVES YOU! )
wow...i can't believe how
much you shop at wal*mart...i
though i did...it is
definitely crazy...wow....
(Submitted by Chiquita )
nanners... receipts...
nanners... receipts... yes,
Huh?, I do believe you're
right. If I squint just
right, I can see the
similarities. And if they're
both squished... well then,
need I say more??
(Submitted by dragonzgaze )
i have found that if you turn
your monitor upside down, and
then stand on your head, that
they do resemble nanners. ok
now tilt your head a little
to the right....see???
see??? they do look alike,
this is what im saying to
you. no to the
right...right......right....ri
ght = nanners, left =headache
(Submitted by Phil Turr )
I am NOT that cheap.
(Submitted by lieu )
tit. that's all, i just
wanted to say tit real fast.
please, carry on.
(Submitted by Abi )
that's ok lieu, you just get it
out of your
system...sometimes, I feel
like shouting BOLLOCKS at
the top of my voice, usually
when the boss asks me to
do something....I just
wanted to share that.
(Submitted by Huh? )
I think I'm carsick from
spinning my head around. Left-
right-left-right weeeeeee!!
<< puking into wastebasket
right now >>
(Submitted by Ms. Ida Know )
BOLLOCKS v : make a mess of,
destroy or ruin [syn: botch,
fumble, botch up, muff, blow,
flub, screw up, ball up,
blunder, spoil, muck up,
bungle, fluff, bollix, bollix
up, bollocks up, bobble,
mishandle, louse up, foul up,
mess up, fuck up]
(Submitted by Huh? )
Abi, I think meebee you
should yell "Blow" instead.
See what the boss does
then....
(Submitted by Abi )
I'll give that a go Huh? and
report back on the result...
(Submitted by Dally )
Hi nice bloke! Huh?, sure you
can borrow my I heart NY
slutty tee. Have at it, babe.
*toss*. Say Cakes, I thought
bollocks was slang for a
dude's balls. Have I been
mistaken all this time??
*embarrassed grimace*
(Submitted by susie )
***-----* ---***
(Submitted by BBoy )
*david attenborough voice*
and Abi can say things like
that because she's married to
the boss. Children, don't try
this at home...
(Submitted by Andre )
That settles it - I go with
the slutty white t. Dally,
I'm divin in! P.S. Are
Britney's eyes so wide apart
so she can get a better look
at what's going in her mouth?
(Submitted by Abi )
BB - you gave the game
away! But yes, we while
away happy afternoons
shouting insults across the
office at each other, ah,
married bliss!
(Submitted by i Can See It Now )
humph! Who appointed William Hague as
chairman of the company? ..... *pout* naff! who
volunteered Sir Clive Sinclair as a reference ....
*icily* BOLLOCKS! who said we didn't need to bill
BT until the project had finished?...*jumping up
and down* who thinks it's cool to use a pink Imac?
(Submitted by Abi )
I can't believe it, outed!!
*holding my head up with
pride* Yes, it's true, I do
have a pink iMac, so there!!!
(Submitted by Cakes )
Dal, you're correct with the
definition....spot on!
(Submitted by Chiq )
Wow, Cakes. A pink COPMUTER.
I'm jealous. Mine's just
plain ol' off-white.
(Submitted by Huh? )
<< admiring self in mirror >>
Hey, I look *bitchin* in this
T!
(Submitted by Ted Koppel )
Excuse me, Abi. What else do
you have that's pink?
(Submitted by Huh? )
Now if only I had a pink
computer, my outfit would be
perfect << wanting to pull
Abi's hair >>
(Submitted by lieu )
well tickle me pink and call
me a clitoris, i never heard
it referred to as an "imac"
before. sounds positively
refreshing!
(Submitted by Abi )
Please don't pull my hair
Huh? You can have the
pink iMac....I want my old
blue one back anyway..
(Submitted by Chiquita )
I am saying goodbye.
*vacating the toaster box*
(Submitted by NYCFASHIONGIRL )
IS THAT 24HR BATH FOR THE
CHORE BOYS? CAUSE IF THOSE
BOYS ARE HOT, I WOULD SURE
LOVE TO WATCH.
(Submitted by chore boy )
eep! someone rescue me! I've been forced to stay
with derek for years. I want to get out on my own,
but noOoo. Derek wants me to hang around and
entertain his cute little girl. Well I'm fed up with it!
Derek's crazy, he should be an artist or something.
I've got to get out... Please? Someone?
(Submitted by Huh? )
Chore Boy... do you do
windows?
(Submitted by susie )
Floss teeth?
(Submitted by Dally )
Chicqa????? What do you mean
you are saying 'good-bye'.
*panic rising*
(Submitted by Abi )
Chiq - you can have the pink
iMac, I promise....Huh? can
have the tangerine one.
(Submitted by Huh? )
<< twirling before the
mirror> Oh thank you thank
you!! I look *tits* in
orange! << smoothing Abi's
hair back into place >>
(Submitted by Huh? )
<< snicker >> Hey Lieu, I
just said *tit*
(Submitted by Jersey )
I am curious on how people define "stalker". If i
were to know a girl, and we hang out in class and
occasionally chat at our college cafetaria, but we
never hang out outside of school, and i were to
follow her to her car, see that it is a nice car,
wonder at how nice her house is, and follow her
home, then talk to her next door neighbor, that
would NOT be considered stalking because it's not
like i follow her all the time, right? She is
pretty cool and is the single-most hottest girl I've
ever known in my life, but i wouldn't want to go out
with her cuz she's too preppy/peppy... but i rather
enjoyed following her, and might just have to do it,
say, on a saturday when i have little to do, and just
see where she goes. Then maybe I'll have a better
idea about what defines her as a person and i
might be attracted...
(Submitted by tits? )
I like the word "tit". It's nice. Titty is too funny.
Breast is too clinical. Boob is too childish. Hooters
are for older guys. Knockers are for guys who don't
get any. Jugs are for idiots. TITS!
(Submitted by joe )
74th POSTER DANCE Woo Hoo Hey
abi are you married??? I
always wanted a girl with a
pink i-mac
(Submitted by please help )
LOL, i was the first poster ever to do a large
amount poster dance. First poster dance!
(Submitted by dragonzgaze )
Jersey, hey this is just a
tip, take it for what you
will. why dont you ask her
what defines her as a person,
it beats the hell out of
going to jail for stalking
her.
(Submitted by Abi )
yes Joe, I am married, Mr
Cakes is a wonderul man,
and still so lively for a 93
year old. The way he can
still shimmy up the four
poster bed, just makes me
beam with pride.
(Submitted by shriveled up )
*pfffff* "Ask her", where do kids these days get such
proposterous notions, eh?
(Submitted by Huh? )
Abi is such a lucky gal.
Personally, I call my 95 year-
old hubby "Winnie the
Pooh" 'cuz I love the way he
can go up-down-and-all-around.
(Submitted by Huh? )
<< flushed with... pride >>
I'm tickled pink!
(Submitted by susie )
Chicq?
(Submitted by Dally )
Cakes, you're such a
delight!! I've got this
wonderful image of Mr. Cakes
doing the 'four poster
shimmy'! A round of prune
juice for everyone!! Drink
up, it's one me. SAAA-LUTE
Mr. Cakes!
(Submitted by Dal )
I know suse, I know. It's
freaking me out too...I miss
that nanner girl.
(Submitted by Ode to Chiquita )
Your posts about nanners
Show im"peck"able manners
and a wit seen by all as
divine
Our love for you increases
(tho lieu's pant's it de-
creases)
With a nanner that
measures 'bout nine
We'll miss your funny posts
But we'll miss you the mosts
We hope you find a happiness
that fits.
'Cos we've said it before
so we won't be a bore
"Hey baby, show us your
NANNERS!
(Submitted by lieu )
hey chiq... c'mon now, say it
with me... titty! now, don't
you feel better?
(Submitted by lieu )
hey Huh?, that's a pleasant
accent you got there. and
jersey, have you met timmy?
(Submitted by jersey )
uh, yeah, i think so. What happened with chiq?
(Submitted by Huh? )
<< eyes brimming with tears
>> I miss Chicq already.
Maybe she'll come back.
Sniff. Someone hand me
that 'nanner scented hankie.
(Submitted by Huh? )
<< gagging >> GROSS, it
smells like
Timmy's 'nanner. And I
don't think Jersey has REALLY
met Timmy 'cuz he'd know so,
not just think so.
(Submitted by Alex Trebek )
Today's Category: Chiquita
Trivia.
(Submitted by This Is Your Nanner )
*applause* Ms Chiquita Banana, you were born at
a very early age to two Berkeley drop-outs,
Starshine Eaglefeather and Trevor. They named
you after the calico carry-bag they left you in when
they went down to Haight-Ashbury for more
'supplies', if you know what I mean. They can't be
here tonight, so here is your old neighbour, Stefan
Berkowicz!!!
(Submitted by Bug Eyes )
Is Stefan any relation to
David?
(Submitted by jersey )
uh, yeah, I know so. We stalk chiqs together. Hey, I
want a cool Native American name...
(Submitted by Abi )
Dal, unfortunately Mr Cakes'
enthusiasm got the better of
him last night, I did ask him
to be careful, but he was
muttering something about
hanging off the monkey
bars, just like in the old
days when he was doing
National Service. I warned
him that the supports were
old.....anyway, he's fine,
nothing that a few hot
flannels and a sprightly
young nurse, in a tight
uniform won't cure.
(Submitted by Andre Running Bare )
I just like plain ol'
gazoongas.
(Submitted by Andre )
A thought on the Chiqca
conundrum - maybe she's gone
off with Mr Gultekin Cici.
Look out for the new Turkish
chain of Chiq*Marts coming to
a kasbah near you!
(Submitted by I steal cable )
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(Submitted by *yawn* )
Look, i know that was hard reading, but here's a
translation for those of us who are smarter than
your average bear. "X. Many x's. Together.
Happily."
(Submitted by *I steal cable yawns* )
I could go thought the whole
alphabet?
(Submitted by Matt Krieg's #2 Fan )
NEWS FLASH: CHIQUITA HAS RUN
OFF WITH MATT KRIEG -- THE #1
WAL-MART MANAGER IN THE
UNIVERSE. #1 IN CUSTOMER
SATIFACTION!! #1 IN CHIQUITA
SATISFACTION!!! NO ONE CAN
RESIST MATT'S DEDICATION TO
CUSTOMER SERVICE. NO ONE CAN
RESIST MATT KRIEG'S SMARTLY
SHINING FLOORS AND FULLY-
STOCKED SHELVES! MATT KRIEG
SELLS FOR LESS. MATT KRIEG IS
#1 AND CHIQUITA KNOWS IT!!!
(Submitted by India Girl )
Jersey, how about Hanuman?
How's that one hit ya?
(Submitted by Jersey )
Hmmm. I purposely left off gazoongas, but now
you've forced me to say the accursed word. Dang,
dang, and more dang. I now face eternal
dangnation. I like Hanuman, but i've never heard
it and i'm not sure i am worthy to say it.
(Submitted by Tom Petty )
Oh my my. Oh hell yes. Honey
put on that party dress.
(Submitted by This Is Your Nanner (Pt 2) )
Your parents' lives were
changed when Sam Walton
gifted the Wal*Mart trademark
to them. This was during
his 'banana' phase, when
every product in his stores
had to feature a banana logo.
Your parents celebrated that
night, remember? Oh, of
course, you were too young!
The party was hard and long,
and when they stumbled out to
their limo, they left you
behind, but a friendly Greek
family took you in and raised
you; and we have flown them
in from Reno Nevada, where
they manage a condo, Mr and
Mrs Stavrikopoulos, and
their children Roula, Soula,
Toula, Voula and Agape!
(Submitted by Dally Petty )
I dig Tom Petty...big time.
oh hell yes.
(Submitted by Brit Chick )
Found this site a week ago,
I'm still wating for a new
receipt. Derek, where are
you? Surely you must be
needing more popcorn by now?
Or have you been called
up....
(Submitted by Derek D Sysop )
A computer upgrade means I
haven't installed my scanner
software yet -- so, a reciept
from last week is still
forthcoming. Will it be
today? Will it be
tomorrow?!? The World may
never know!
(Submitted by Juan )
Thank God for brit chicks, giving ol derek a kick in
the seat, get him to workin! Yeah. I'll tell you what
derek, I'll BUY that reciept from you. 50 pesos!
What a deal, but only for a limited time. Do you
know how much it'll be worth when you become
president? Just email me, i would realy like that
receipt.
(Submitted by Dalliance adoring Derek )
I just love when Derek speaks.
(Submitted by More T. Petty )
"I'm an Insider, I've been
burned by the fire. Oh, and
I've had to live with some
hard promises, I've crawled
through the briar. I'm an
Insider."
(Submitted by Oddjobbob )
what a delightfully deranged
website
(Submitted by Scout )
In order to achieve my Eagle
badge, I have to do a good
deed. So, in keeping with the
spirit of this site, I'm
gonna sit here, and hold my
breath, until Chiquita comes
back. FILTER! *big
inhale...cheeks puffed*
(Submitted by Chiquita )
*poking my index finger into
Scout's puffed cheek* Please
don't turn blue on my account.
(Submitted by Scout )
*PHEWWWW* Works every time.
WOW...sparkles...
(Submitted by Scout )
Great use of the finger
Chiq...*sniff* hmmm, so
THAT'S what you've been
doing...taking a W-M BATH
24R.
(Submitted by we love our Chiqs )
EVERYBODY LOVES A GOOD
NANNER!!
(Submitted by Ninja Tosaki )
I prefer the bad ones, you know, the ones that are
rejected by most people, they are more interesting
and unique. I step on them...
(Submitted by Susie/Gandalf )
Fly you fools! Fly!!!!!!
(Submitted by This Is Your Nanner (pt 3) )
You grew up, thinking you
were a Greek goddess who just
happened to have blond hair.
All the kids at school teased
you because of your souvlaki
and tabouli sandwiches, but
deep down you knew you were
right. You always had an
interest in animals, so after
school, you applied for a job
at the biggest office block
in town – WalmartWorld. You
started work looking after Mr
Walton’s eagles, and
acquiring new specimens. And
here is your fellow eagle
worker, Eddie “the eagle”
Edwards!
(Submitted by Huh? )
<< grinning broadly like a
fool> Wow, I've been away
for a bit and... Derek
spoke.. Chiq came back ...
an Eagle Scout visited... my
world is rockin'!!
(Submitted by Huh Petty? )
Speaking of rockers, Dal, I'm
with ya on Tom Petty. <<
admiring my party dress in
the mirror >>
(Submitted by lieu )
performing a richard petty in
your buddy's baker might lead
to dick trickle.
(Submitted by instead... )
i prefer to keep my marlin
sterling.
(Submitted by Scout )
lieu, you are the funniest
mother f*cker since Richard
Jeni banged my Mom in the
bathroom at the W-M BATH 24R.
(Submitted by joe )
125th poster
dance:) :) :) :) :) :) :) :)
:) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :)
:) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :)
:) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :)
(Submitted by frankenstien )
Dereck is ALIVE
AALLIIVVEEEEE!!!!!!!!!
(Submitted by Marcel Marceau )
"
"
(Submitted by quark )
I am strange
(Submitted by Brit Chick )
Deeeerrrrrreeeekkkkkk! Where
are you? Is your new
scanner's instruction book
too complicated for your huge
pulsating receipt filled
brain? Come on, we need you.
(Submitted by Richard Van Dyke )
"All Richards are Dicks"
(Submitted by Dyke Van Dick )
If you think she's spunky,
cover your monkey.
(Submitted by BobM )
For a good time call 205-833-
8891
(Submitted by Fred Gumby )
*door slam* huff and puff
running up to the
microphone "and now for
something completely
different!" run run *door
slam*
(Submitted by Phyllis Dean )
What is the wind speed
velocity of an unladen Fred
Gumby?
(Submitted by Ma Bell )
But BobM, that's long
distance from here!
(Submitted by Cat Woman )
<< pant pant >> I'm just
waiting with baited breath
for that new receipt...
(Submitted by Tosaki )
I am just curious, "a computer upgrade means", so
that's like the definition? If I looked under
computer upgrade in the dictionary it would say "I
haven't installed my scanner software yet "? Geez,
that's why I am having so hard time learning stupid
English.
(Submitted by dragonzgaze )
derek, good lord honey, its
software, its a disk, plug in
the scanner put the disk in
and hit enter, how hard is
it. i mean i know i have no
life, i say this without
shame, but its bugging that
you dont have a new receipt
up. im going crazy over here.
(Submitted by timmy? )
I am freely admitting that i am quite in love with
this receipt, if it is not the last one i shall quite
possibly kill myself. Please please Derek, I beg of
thee, let this one keep it's spot forever.
(Submitted by in lieu of poo )
oooh, look... it's a
floatie! we flush and we
flush and it won't go away.
(Submitted by er, TIMMY! )
I am amused. But i don't much care about your
bathroom problems... so... yeah... ok, I'm done
being amused, now i'm just having an eye-rolling
problem. Btw, you already used floatie, you're
slipping, come up with something new or i won't be
offended. I'm honestly surprised you haven't gone
to one of those your-momma-joke sites and milked
it dry.
(Submitted by jimmy? )
I am waiting for dal. I know she'll come around.
Some day. Maybe. If there is God. Which i think
there is. Ok. Shall i write a song for you? Yeah.
And i'll post it on a site somewhere...
(Submitted by antimony )
actually, i do still email
him. don't know why, though
(Submitted by TJD )
me either.
(Submitted by The Reverend )
Do you, Timmy?, take this to
be your lawfully wedded
receipt? To have and to hold,
from this day forward. With
sick comments and healthy
ones. For as long as you both
shall post?
(Submitted by Huh? )
<< sniff >> I do love a nice
wedding.
(Submitted by wally )
i'm not sure if i'm laughing
because of all the funny and
stupid comments, or just
because maybe i'm insane
enough like the rest of you
people to read all this SHIT
about some DUMBASS who has a
TOTALLY RETARDED hobby
(Submitted by wally )
they're coming to take me
away ho ho, they're coming to
take me away ha ha he he ha ha
hhhhhhheaaaaeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
aaggggggggggggggggggggggggg
NO NO NO i don't want a shot.
no more needles.
PLLLEEEAAAASSSSEEE!!!!!!!!!!
(Submitted by guber )
i think i need a straight
jacket. on second thought,
better order one up for
everyone who took the time to
read all this shit
(Submitted by Bubba )
I'll let you in on a little
secret, wally. We only hang
out here to make fun of YOU
idiots...and it works. How'd
that worm taste?
(Submitted by Stevie Nicks Apono Bulbs )
Tom, stop draggin' my heart
around
(Submitted by guber picker )
Yer all fucked!!!!!!!
(Submitted by lieu )
timmy, isn't that your anus
calling? i think it want's
your head to come home.
(Submitted by Aim to Please )
** climbing into the toaster
box ** I'm crushed, totally
devastated that Wally doesn't
like this site. I want
everybody to like me and
Derek in this perfect world
(Submitted by The Observer )
Let's see... Wally/Guber
actually took time to read
the comments... and then post
one... hmm.... I think Mr.
Potty Mouth should perhaps
drop his stone and look in
the mirror.... And
also, "Guber" is
spelled "Goober" ....
(Submitted by Gomer )
Sha-ZAM!
(Submitted by lieu )
may his fairy godmother be
liberace.
(Submitted by Shecky )
..... so then Luann says to
Gomer, "Gomer! That's not my
belly button!" To which Gomer
replies, "And that's not my
finger either!"
(Submitted by Vince Carter )
"MOVE IT, MOVE IT, MOVE IT!!!"
(Submitted by Luann )
"PUHLEEEEZE!!!"
(Submitted by Español Amante )
Las palabras no pueden
expresar cuánto amo este
recibo.
(Submitted by ~I speak the spanish~ )
Indeed they cannot!
(Submitted by ~My landscaper speaks the language~ )
I agree-o
(Submitted by susie )
Is this the way to Amarillo?
Or even Dragons house?
(Submitted by Patty LaBelle )
Voulez vous coucher avec moi
ce soir?
(Submitted by Huh? )
<< plopping down on coach in
toaster box >> Why sure, why
not!? Whew, my feet hurt
anyhow from my big day of
nothing. Scoot over there
PattyCakes, make some room.
(Submitted by Jennings )
Tonight is not good, tommorrow night?
(Submitted by BobM )
Pick up the phone.
(Submitted by Abi )
Hey susie, did anyone
remember to pick up that
sock for dragongaze...?
(Submitted by CJ Rules )
It is the year 2032, and a
father and his son walk the
streets of lower Manhattan.
approaching the site where
the WTC used to be in the end
of the 20th century, the
father sighs and
comments, "to think that
right here used to be the
Twin Towers..." The son, not
understanding, asks his
father: "What are the Twin
Towers?" The father smiles
and looks at the son, and
explains, "The Twin Towers
were two huge buildings that
used to be here until 2001,
when the Arabs destroyed
them." The son looks up to
his father, and asks, "And
what are the Arabs?"
(Submitted by BTW, reefer and chronic are ok names too )
I am in a public place, or i would be laughing
hysterically, but i *still* think that generalizing
races and religions is either the cause of or caused
by chronic stupidity.
(Submitted by Duke )
Spoken like a true Polack.
(Submitted by Archie Bunker )
Shaddup, ya meathead!
(Submitted by Ronnie Schell )
Sha-ZAM!
(Submitted by Funny Smell )
Ker-PLUT!
(Submitted by Goob )
C'mon now, Ronnie Schell
didn't say sha-ZAM, that was
Gomer. But nice obscure
reference with the name
anyway. Wanna hear me do my
Cary Grant? "JUDY JUDY JUDY"
(Submitted by susie )
Do you love me?
(Submitted by judyjudyjudydoyoucare )
Noboddy torks like thet
(Submitted by Inspector Gadget )
GO GO GADGET... receipt!!
(Submitted by Agent 86 of Control )
would you believe ... a Kaos
agent broke into my house and
stole the scanner?
(Submitted by I worship Derek, Lord of all )
Derek bought exactly 193 items where the cents is
83 and the name of the product contains and "a".
(Submitted by I could be wrong, I'll have to see, but I think when i bought a big mac meal and a double with cheese meal it cost $6.66 )
i almost counted the subtotal on this one, tsk tsk.
(Submitted by Max )
Chief, you're NOT gonna
believe this...
(Submitted by I eat nuclear waste )
I made the cashier repeat it over and over again,
she was mad. So she she had a scowl on her face
chanting 666 over and over again.
(Submitted by Huevo )
There is a huge TV in the lounge type area in the
cafetaria at the U center at my college, or actually
was, somebody stole it, hah! I wish it was me, that
t.v. was sooo big. I'm jealous. I'll figure out who it is
and steal it from them.
(Submitted by i worship derek, lord god of all )
Geesh, nobody even checked my work on
that one up there. It was so far off. Only
three items containing an "a" have had a cent
extension of .83, and amusingly enough, all three
cost exactly $.83. The scews, the sauve
conditioner, and the sauve shampoo. Which just
shows that when you are as suave as D, you can
get screwed for a cheap $.83 by the exhooter girls
that work at walmart. (i did some checking on this
Shannon character, and she worked at hooters
before walmart, and they've since fired her for how
good she is with the customers [ie, derek, in aisle
12] and now she works at this stripper club where
she bares it all while the married losers drool at her
while they drink the bad-tasting fake beer at Jake's).
Anyway, the point is... Derek got laid at Frankie's
the other day, so just think on that. $.83! How does
he do it? timmy!
(Submitted by great )
And it looks like the crib still stands as the
most expensive non-electronic item bought.
(Submitted by Snoop Doggy Dog )
Say yo - me n'my homies,
we's hanging out in da crib!
(Submitted by Bonnie Piesse's lame chicken )
Sorry, great, but the bike
cost more than the crib - and
he only bought it three months
ago, shame on you for being so
unobservant!
(Submitted by Gern Blandston )
Finally bought a filter for
all of that oil.........
straining it thru the Dri-
Bottoms isn't condusive to
peak automotive performance..
(Submitted by Honest )
Thank you for buying an oil filter to commemorate
Bruce Springsteen's 52nd Birthday!
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