Visitor Comments:

(Submitted by susie )

YYYYEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSSS All that I needed to kick the Prozac habit for good. Sparkle 8r in large quantities, some more ALL, babies babies and infants, the socks will keep Ronnie Rhino's tusk warm

(Submitted by susie )

Oh i forgot you dont know Ronnie. Never mind, *disco dusting sparkle dance*

(Submitted by Rickets )

Oh yeah, I'm doing the TIGHTest third poster dance ever!

(Submitted by Dalliance )

INFANT SOCKS?? Is there something we should know, Big D?? Wow, great price on the TIGHT. TIGHT don't come cheap these days. Glad to see Derek got some. WELCHS...I once date a WELCH. Happy T-day.

(Submitted by BalmainB )

Pity about the floppy ears, eh Dally? Otherwise welch rabbits would be quite cute around the house....

(Submitted by cheekymonkey )

wow im impressed... a GRT VALUE 60 for only 77 cents! you know, last time i got a GRT VALUE it was 89 cents, but then again, it was a GRT VALUE 59, not 60!

(Submitted by Garrison )

Sheesh, I wish coul get shampoo for a buck fifty...

(Submitted by lambie )

I dont know what it is...and I dont care...I want an ALL TIGHT that SPARKLES!

(Submitted by Turkey Chiq )

Dude, you coulda bought a LOOSE for $1.98. And wassup wif the BABY SHAMPOO & INFANT SOCKS. Der, have you got a bun in the oven?

(Submitted by donsid )

do you have any reciepts for guns or a cd with a warning label?

(Submitted by Jeff Smith )

Would anyone like to join me for a game of Everquest tonight?

(Submitted by Brit Chick )

ALL X TIGHT CONDITIONE X! Sounds pretty good to me. I'm surprised the FBI aren't investigating.... I usually have turkey for Thanksgiving, not WELCHS!

(Submitted by Nigel )

Reading down sounds like the title of seventies porn movie.- cue twanky music......

(Submitted by Nigel )

Sorry meant to say the plot.

(Submitted by again )

Don't you wish you had a scolling mouse.

(Submitted by Matt Krieg's #2 Fan )

ALL I CAN ADD IS THAT I AM SO HAPPY THAT DEREK HAS FINALLY COME TO HIS SENSES AND SHOPPED MATT KRIEG'S STORE. MATT'S STORE HAS A GIFT FOR EVERY WISH AND A FULL SUPPLY OF GADGETS FOR HIM AND HER. WHEN YOU WALK INTO MATT'S STORE, YOU CAN BE ASSURED OF LOW PRICES AND GENUINE CUSTOMER SERVICE. NO ONE ROCKS MY WORLD LIKE MATT KRIEG. MATT TRULY DEMONSTRATES HIS GRATITUDE TO THE CUSTOMER IN EVERY WAY, EVEN THROUGH THIS RECEIPT, AND IS #1 IN SATISFACTION!

(Submitted by Just Wondering )

ALL X TIGHT.... is that some kinda procedure to get an old lady back to feelin' like a virgin again? If so, I'll take 2 please.

(Submitted by dragonzgaze )

oh look you bought an ALL i love those ALLs they are great to have around the house, and the TIGHT boy you can hardly find that these days. I have been needing a GRT VALUE lately as well, good to see you got one of those. I'm a bit confused about the INFANT SOCKS though, i mean are you trying to tell us something....you ahve small feet? *waving and saying hi to those in the toaster box*

(Submitted by melon )

its a strange day when you wake up every morning in christmas.

(Submitted by NYCFASHIONGIRL )

I WANNA SPARKLE ALL TIGHT! WITH MY BABY SHAMPOO AND MY INFANT TIGHTS (SOCKS). WHILE I SIT ON THE CONNER TRYING TO MAKE 77 CENTS OUT OF 60 CENTS. LET ME TELL YOU THIS WAS HOW LIFE WAS MEANT (TO BE).

(Submitted by susie )

Is it Christmas for all melons everywhere?

(Submitted by kuroneko )

Wait a minute...so baby shampoo costs $1.48 and infant socks cost $5.96. Those must be some high quality socks, or a tiny bottle of shampoo.

(Submitted by kuroneko )

If it's a GRT VALUE 60, shouldn't it cost 60 cents? I don't think it was such a GRT VALUE...

(Submitted by Andre )

Ah ah, ebony eyes, ah ah, ebony eyes...I could see that I'd have to move slowly, like a cat at night in the trees...She was the same as a hundred ladies, but when my eyes looked at her I learned that she was keepin secret fire and if I got real close I’d burn...Derek you old swinger!

(Submitted by Faecal tissu )

Stick your grt value, I want a grt vaule and NOW!

(Submitted by James Carson )

Just for kicks, why dont you ask for a gift reciept on one of your items next time you get something.

(Submitted by Huh? )

Infant Socks.... the Clinton's cat when it was young? Think about it.... Derek could use the Baby Shampoo on Infant Socks.

(Submitted by Huh? )

** cleaning my screen with SPARKLE 8R ** Now THAT would be TIGHT!!!!

(Submitted by Huh? )

** slipping into the Rainbow Butterfly ** Hey! These things work!! See ya, kids! ** blowing kisses bye bye **

(Submitted by Robin )

Holey Crotch, Batman!!! *smack*

(Submitted by in lieu of john holmes )

tight? what's not?

(Submitted by Gern Blandston )

In lieu of John Holmes, I'd use Ron "The Hedgehog" Jeremy. Ron Jeremy spoke in class today, y'know.

(Submitted by GatGym )

Did he give a TIGHT speech? Last time I saw him, he was ALL out of CONDITONE X.

(Submitted by Ms. York )

Pardon me, but is that my GRT VALUE 60 sitting right there on the floor next to your feet? No, don't move, let me get that... *cheap, and somewhat pedophilic, feel*

(Submitted by Just Wondering )

Did anyone notice the tiny tear in the bottom corner of the receipt? I hate it when I get a tiny tear in the bottom.

(Submitted by T. )

I think your website is hilarious, and I commend you for your diligence!

(Submitted by Mother Mary )

I just wanna commend him for his TIGHT!

(Submitted by Reed Malloy )

INFANT SOCKS? Aren't those against the law?

(Submitted by kent mccord )

damn skippy they are, but really groovy..

(Submitted by lambie )

isn't it about time for Derek to start his Christmas shopping?? can't wait to see what hes gonna get us this year!! :-)*climbing up to sit on the corner of the toaster box, in my ALL TIGHT that SPARKLES*....hmmmm...anyone see that hat tippin' cowboy? hope he hasn't went to the OTHER SIDE...K-Mart! ewwwwwwwwww......

(Submitted by Cakes )

Nice TIGHT lambie, have you tried a Rainbow Butterfly over it?

(Submitted by Cakes again )

actually that looks a lot ruder than it was meant to be......sorry!!.....I'll just sit in the corner here and be quiet.

(Submitted by lambie )

Cakes...not rude at all...do you really think a Rainbow Butterfly would help? *smoothing down my ALL TIGHT*

(Submitted by The Cowboy )

--^^-- tipping hat to the Rainbow butterfly on Lambie -- ^^--

(Submitted by Garth )

Christmas shopping??!!! SHA- WING!

(Submitted by lambie )

Cowboy...you ole hat tippin' flirt you ;-)

(Submitted by MOGGEE )

The code numbers for the baby shampoo match the computer's launch code from "War Games".

(Submitted by MOGGEE )

Isn't Sparkle the detergent from Japan that has Homer Simpson's face on the box?

(Submitted by Not Andre )

Sorry Moggie - you must have been watching a European print. They write their sevens with a bar through the middle - which yankees translated as ones. So if the shampoo code number started 00121.. you would be correct.

(Submitted by Brit Chick )

They've just changed my local ASDA into a Wal-Mart. I might start a rival site....

(Submitted by Bonnie Piesse's lame chicken )

OK, our regular little updatey poo on the state of Derek's shopping. His favourite operator is still that hot little minx, #602. Who wouldn't want a bit of hot checkout action with that chick flashing her barcodes like that? And our Derek is a bit of a religious man - his favourite checkout is #7. Must be the one near the missing children's board. Most expensive item is the printer, bought on Feb 8 98 for $148; the least expensive items were all bought on one day: 5 plant saucers on 15 April 2000 for 14 cents each. And has anyone noticed the little item he's slipped into his basket this week - the infant socks? I thought Chastity was going to school now; doesn't that make her a bit old for infant socks? Hmm, methinks there's something sinister going on, and it is all to be found in Derek's basket.

(Submitted by Laura )

i was just wondering if you buy things so that people will have an interst in reading your recipts?

(Submitted by Tight at ALL Night )

I signed a release form to let Howard Stern's camera crew film me and a friend in the "Squeeze Box" at the Exotic Erotic Ball. Is that bad?

(Submitted by Dalliance )

George Harrison is with Krishna now...Peace be with him..*slugging down some Welchs in George's honor*

(Submitted by Andre )

Dally, I'd love to take you out of your chains - your eyes got me dreamin', your eyes got me blind, your eyes got me hopin' that I'll be holding you close tonight.

(Submitted by Huh? )

* yawn * I'm sure ready to see Derek's Christmas receipt!

(Submitted by Beth )

did your fish die? No bloodworms or fish food for a while. Shop in the housewares dpt more often

(Submitted by roger )

Seems to be a steady purchase of lubricants and tissues...

(Submitted by Gern by way of Hank Hill )

I found Bobby in his room the other day with Peggy's Fingerhut catalog justa' whacking away with a box of tissues and some hand lotion.

(Submitted by Chelle )

Can anyone explain a Grt Value 60 but ya had to pay 77 cents? Why isn't it a Grt value 77? I hope you added some vodka to that welchs

(Submitted by lambie )

*whisperin'* hey Huh...whatcha think Derek's gonna buy us for Christmas? I'm getting worried...its only 21 days till Santa comes...and Derek hasn't even started shopping yet....*sitting down and danglin' my feet over the toaster box*

(Submitted by Chiq )

Uh, lambie, you're more than welcome to perch on the edge of the toaster box like that, but your dangling foot just hit me right upside the head. Remember, some of us live in this box, so don't make me come up there & show you my ALL TIGHT CONDITIONE X, li'l missy. And Derek, would you please buy some mistle camel toe... see, I'm about to go on a road trip to meet a friend somewhere in the middle...

(Submitted by Cakes )

Chiq!! A road trip.......can I come too......please!!! It's too cold over here.....

(Submitted by Chiq )

Sure Cakes, c'mon along! The more of us in the middle, the better. Scout & I are headed to meet up with Habib & his bicycle. And bring your INFANT SOCKS, 'cos it's getting a bit cold here, too.

(Submitted by susie )

Well tell me if you ever get to Dragonsgaze......

(Submitted by BreakerBreakerBoy )

10-4, little buddy. We got us a convoy!

(Submitted by Cakes )

Yay! The gang's on the road again *whispering* Chiq, don't tell Habib, but I've bought him some new streamers for his handlebars as a Christmas present!!

(Submitted by gern blandston )

Um... what does the toaster box have to do with Derek and the plague we all know as Matt Krieg?? <giggle, tee hee> Oh look!!! Look how cute we are... (sound of me throwing up a box of Sam's Deluxe Mac and Cheese) Please.

(Submitted by Roger Roundly )

I put anthrax in bananas.

(Submitted by A Question )

is Timmy! in the house?

(Submitted by Chiqca )

Uh, Rog, that ain't funny. Never, and I mean NEVER, joke about nanners.

(Submitted by Cakes )

gern, the toaster box is a key element, it's where Derek kept his receipts, before putting them here.

(Submitted by in lieu of john holmes )

all tight? heh heh... you bet it is.

(Submitted by Watching powerpuff girls, I was gonna do an impression of Mojo-jojo, but I assume you guys would not be amused. )

Yeah, I'm here. Sup?

(Submitted by the parot ate a couple )

I dunno Chiq, pass me some of those bananas, I've heard that the deadly poisoness ones clear your sinuses pretty quick.

(Submitted by why no applause? )

Whoooo! The semester is over! I have a month off! Now you guys won't be deprived any longer! That's right, constant Timmy!, 24-7, at full strength, not diluted from those incessant distractions by exams and whatnot. For your viewing pleasure, I present to you, TIMMY!

(Submitted by aw flurk )

i'm outta here.

(Submitted by Gern Blandston )

Whew... Thanks Cakes... I didn't want to be left out of the HoneyComb hideout. Okay... whats with the "nanners?"...

(Submitted by A Bad Burt Reynolds impersonation )

Whah shoot, Chiq, Ah've gern and bought that English muffin some of dose purty crystal thingies yer put on the spokes of yer bah-sikkel! An' a daisy seat cover, an' all!

(Submitted by Andre )

My name is Andre, I am a showgirl, with yellow feathers in my hair and a dress cut down to there. Is that right? I didn't fluff my lines did I?

(Submitted by Cakes )

The feathers are perfect....yellow is so you...

(Submitted by Gern Blandston )

this is what I'm talking about. Later.

(Submitted by Chiquita )

*munching on a nanner* Gern B., the nanner is a legend... it'll make your 8R SPARKLE, it'll make your 60 a GRT VALUE, it'll put CONDITIONE in your X. Does that clear it all up? And Burt, I think Cakes is going to love the bicycle spoke crystals... every girl wants sparkly wheels for Christmas.

(Submitted by Angry Jack )

Did you know that dolphins are better at chess than humans? Isn't that amazing? And for dogs, when they gnaw on thier balls it is the equivelent of us blowing a kiss to someone. Even more amazing! Maybe now I'll stop kicking dogs every time I see them engaged in what I previously thought was a nasty activity. I mean, they're showing thier love for everyone. All the time. How cute.

(Submitted by Gern Blandston )

er.. no, it doesn't... gosh, it is true.. the geek shall inherit the earth. I'll go tell our high school quarterback that yes, high school WAS his peak whilst he pumps someone's gas. And that he shouldn't have beat up Rob Harrison, because he could buy and sell him 8000 times over now. What does this have to do with Walmart receipts? EXACT-FUCKING-LY. Now then, the conditioner, ALL, TIGHT.. ok... that we got... that doesn't have a damn thing to do with "nanners" (you must be southern.. that's cool.) And don't give me the "oh, you gotta read all the receipts.." I've done that. Oh, and Angry Jack? If you could do that ball licking thing, me thinks you wouldn't be so angry. Hell, I wouldn't be able to keep a job. Still not a member of the HoneyComb hideout (and pretty sure I'll never be) Gern.

(Submitted by Roger Roundly )

Oh Dear. sorry about that.. that wasn't cricket, now was it?

(Submitted by Ah flurk. )

There goes all the fun again.

(Submitted by Gern Blandston )

yup.

(Submitted by susie )

Yyyyyyyyyyyyyyeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee eeesssssssssssssssssssssssssss sssssssss we havvvvvvvvvvvvvvvveeeeeeeeeeee eeeee ttttttttttttttteeeeeeeeeeeeeqq qqqqqqqqquuuuuuiiiiiiiilllllll lllllaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa........ .............

(Submitted by Gern Blandston )

Say Susie, y'know tequila makes certain keys stick on the ol' keyboard, dontcha?

(Submitted by Scary Cat )

that Gern fella is a'scarin' me, Paw....

(Submitted by Huh? )

AW RATS! No new receipt yet? Pass me the tequilla.

(Submitted by Dri-Bottoms )

Ok, what happened to the dri- bottoms i skipped 3 yrs and you stopped with the dri- bottoms? this is unacceptable. When i find your email adress we'll have a talk young man. Oh yah, did you and your kids outgrow the dri-bottoms or somethin? I'll have to consult the lists

(Submitted by The Observer )

Who are the "Lists"? How do these "Lists" know everything? Why must we consult the "Lists"? Tell me, answer me, I must know.

(Submitted by i am the way )

Gern, as anyone who "read all the reciepts" knows, and as I've probably mentioned before, not everthing contained on this site is related to walmart reciepts. Furthermore, if I had to assign a percentage to the comments that made sense to me I'd put it at about 40%. Percentage relating to reciepts that made sense to me? Maybe 3%. And that's the way I like it. Moreover, DEREK doesn't like honeycombs.

(Submitted by dancing in the streets )

Yes, like I said the other day, flurk the customer, bottom line is me. And lassie. She's pretty cool, too, what with the saving me all the time.

(Submitted by Gern Blandston )

yo.. i am the way.... how do you know what this guy likes?? It seems that people use this site for their own little pathetic in-talk with others with an inflated sense of well-being.. Gosh, I'm real sorry... I'll just go sit in the corner over here and not scare anyone. You, however im the way... let's make a bet... you walk on water, and I'll just sit politely. Thanks.. and remember, Jesus saves, Moses goes 2 for 4 with a homer and 2 RBI's. And what happened to the cat?

(Submitted by I am the way )

Well, gern, if you had truly read all the reciepts you would have been saved. Simple as that. You would have seen that this site is the new bible. Everything contained on here? Gospel. THE gospel. THE truth, for those few who didn't know what gospel means. And, well, just drop ol Derek an email and he would happily share his opinion of Honeycombs with you. Matt is like him in that respect. Satisfaction.

(Submitted by Gern Blandston )

Well, well well... I have as a matter of fact. Top to bottom. Read the whole thing. The Honeycomb reference is the whole "wink wink" and "look how cute we are talking on this website while we should be working" The Honeycomb hideout?? Get it? Or were you too busy trying to get the nails out of your hands to watch cereal commercials as a kid?? Now then, you go back to your cube, check to make sure your supervisor isn't looking over your shoulder and come up with some witty retort. You suck, and this site sucks too. What happened to people like Alex Trebek?? Folks that had something funny to post instead of all this "oh how fucking cute we are" bullshit. Good luck to Derek.. and the cat, Chore Boy and all of the Dri- Bottoms that are holding the potting soil that he's surely growing pot in right now. Darryl Marchetta is the way, you pompous windbag. I hope Jehovah's Witnesses knock on your door at 2 in the morning. Have a nice day. Gern.

(Submitted by Gern Blandston )

Jesus... I'm just as bad as you people. Sorry.

(Submitted by Gern Blandston )

No I'm not!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

(Submitted by kuroneko )

why can't i have a conversation like that....

(Submitted by Someone )

uh-oh...Infant Socks ...new baby? Do I sense a new wave of Dri-Bottoms coming on?