Visitor Comments:

(Submitted by Abi )

*first poster dance*!! I can't believe it...Derek - what time did you post this!!? This is an interesting one, Weekender X - not buying naughty videos again, settling down with the ol' dew AND all those cookies - wild thing!! Still, it's nice to see you've got bags for clearing up the mess....

(Submitted by Abi )

*still dancing around full of excitement* Where is everybody! I can't believe I'm all on my own here with no-one to celebrate a new receipt - where are youuuuu.......

(Submitted by Dalliance )

Abi!!! woohooo PARTY ON!!! 1st and 2nd??? You Catbird!! *doing third poster jiggy*..wow...Sam's and Sac cookies..Dew and Gatorade...I think D must have a weekend getaway planned with a Crocodile! I'd like to see the duo belt that sweetheart shows up in!!!

(Submitted by Dalliance )

STOP the presses...what is that strange half o' spot down at the bottom of the receipt??? *still wiggling butt in jiggy dance*

(Submitted by Terry )

I think the excitement of the impending WEEKENDER got to him, could be a jiggy spot.

(Submitted by Terry )

...and regarding the dame bramage, I'll have you know that my mind is as sharp as a tack, knock on wood...COME IN.

(Submitted by lieu )

7th heaven, not that i watch that crappy trash. i'm strictly jerry springer, all the way...ralph, earl moore!

(Submitted by Freeeak )

I like orange Gatorade the best.

(Submitted by hefty )

I've got a sac of cookies for you...

(Submitted by walfix )

abi, did you and dal moisten the corner in all your excitement? regardless of the truth just tell me YES! YES! YES!

(Submitted by mellow yellow )

3 days till grandparents day. i think i'll send them a couple of ugly-assed shirts they'll never wear and $10.00.

(Submitted by Chiquita )

Pssssst... little boy, over here... hey little boy, you wanna cookie from my sac? *fumbling around in sac* *sudden giggle* That tickles.

(Submitted by haywood jablome )

ok im you have sex with your families dog would it be incest or beastyality??

(Submitted by lieu )

nowadays it'd be presidential

(Submitted by hefty trash bag )

My Aunt Mabel is a large storage bag.

(Submitted by Chiqca )

Disclaimer: the "little boys" referred to above must be over the age of 18 and have their own gatorade.

(Submitted by Chiqca )

As well as a fully equipped tool set.

(Submitted by Mrs Campbell )

I am getting so tired and exhausted here! But yes, it is all worth it! In the midst of baking a large Olympic torch relay team's worth of Tim Tams, and running up a whole swag of frilly lacy hankies, I'm having time to reflect on the spirit of the Olympic Games and the true meaning of the Olympic flame...um, demonstration of fascist political might, right? Oops, sorry about that, I just got my hand caught in the Janome. I've already got a long list of sponsors for the hankie waving ceremony, Dapto/Albion Park Bowling Club, Bathroom Vanities'R'Us, The American Memory Institute...it's so fabulous! And all that lovely folding money rolling in can be put towards even more Tim Tams and employing undernourished middle eastern refugees in Mrs Campbell's Flesh and Sweat Shop of Love. Life has never been rosier! Derek, I'm wondering if you might want to sponsor a hankie? We could stick a great big receipt on it, maybe one with a few WM FAC TISSUES? Or maybe we could even arrange one of those annoying pop up little ProHosting banners we all know so well and love intimately in those special private moments after the Bold and the Beautiful. And speaking of catbirds, Dalliance, I have one calling right now, meow, it goes

(Submitted by Heidi Fleiß )

Are those storage bags the Idaho relations of the ho mird abag?

(Submitted by Twinkella Frostylips )

24 ounces of dew for the elven host of Mithridir? May the fair winds of the crystals of joy bless your hearts for eternity. www.geocities.com/Area51/Shire /9580

(Submitted by in lieu of silicone )

hi mrs. c. saw your torch procession coming up from the underdepths of the barrier reef just as grandly as honey rider did in dr. no and i'll swear it looked just like a giant aim-n-flame. my chest, again like honey rider's, swelled with pride.

(Submitted by Twinkella Frostylips )

24 ounces of dew for the elven host of Mithridir? May the fair winds of the crystals of joy bless your hearts for eternity. www.geocities.com/Area51/Shire /9580

(Submitted by Mrs Campbell )

It'll be more than your chest swelling with pride as you see my snotty flaps waving in the wind! It's so exciting, my niece Florry Winkpuss has run up an exquisite chenille roof decoration for the Olympic torch relay convoy vehicle. Wouldn't I love to be driving THAT! We got a great big convoy, ain't she a beautiful sight......................... ...........

(Submitted by mellow bellow )

I wonder if in a rare moment of privacy any Olympic torch bearer ever gave life to the fanciful notion of lighting his/her flattulence with said illuminance. What are the chances it might someday become an Olympic event? Of course, it will have to waft gently throught the intermediate "Spectator Sport" stage first. Would the judges panel still raise score cards? How many decimal points would it be calculated to? And what's to keep the East Germans, well, okay the Chinese women from cheating? Can't wait to hear it live in THX SurroundSound. Maybe they could even work in some synchronized and ventriloquism events.

(Submitted by Freud )

Screw Mushu and the Compubank he rode in on.

(Submitted by lieu )

mrs. c!!! me thinks you've got a mite bit of ian in your flemming. your niece sounds almost as divine as your snotty flaps, especially since she got rid of the chenile (don't you know that twice-washed, thrice felt mexican bullfighter canvases are all the rage now?) i'm quite sure y'all will have a galore-ious time during the inaugural passing of the, ummm, torch.

(Submitted by Math 101 )

24 oz. DEW for $2.98? The other day you paid $0.98 for 2 LITERS! That new gal they got at the checkout you've been visiting so much the last few days has got you thinking with the wrong head.

(Submitted by that alecia idiot from clueless )

i'm admittedly clueless, sigmund. who's mushu and what's a compubank?

(Submitted by walfix )

right on math 69. i was gonna say the same thing as soon as i quit thinkin about florry winking (and dal in the cactus section reaching for a just-out-of-reach-pot.)

(Submitted by woody, woody harrelson )

i wanna be a pot

(Submitted by sad sac )

i'll bet sam's cookies are getting a little stale

(Submitted by sam pharton )

come shop at my store instead. it's called...

(Submitted by in lieu of poo )

WEEKENDER? Is that like Depends?

(Submitted by Biology 101 )

If the next purchase involves CONDOMS, (not to be confoozed with STORAGE BAGS) we'll know fer sure "somethings up"

(Submitted by hummer )

Maybe Derek doesn't need these items, maybe he's just stalking matt krieg!

(Submitted by sam pharton )

hey, if'n you get lucky whilst pushing heavy items outta my store, it's likely gonna be wth a none too smart-phart-mart-cart-tart. (with a wart)

(Submitted by lieu lieu )

okay bio, that was funny.

(Submitted by you go boss )

let's hope the storage bag is for his geranimal shirt

(Submitted by pepper )

I just found this site, Hilarious. Also love the commentary from posters here. Almost pee'd my pants laughing.

(Submitted by where hugo, i will fall, lieu. )

what scares me is that these are the exact same items raymond burr bought on his first trip to the corner store in hitchock's "rear window."

(Submitted by in lieu of huge )

welcome pepper. me thinks you'll find some pretty kind folk here with more-defined smile than frown facial muskles. let your fingers do the walking and enjoy.

(Submitted by carolieu king )

something inside just died and i can't find my aim-n-flame.

(Submitted by Dalliance Knocking at Heaven's Door )

Oh Terry, I hope...yo, Terry over here *knocking on your wood* I sure hope *giggle* that was kinda fun *knocking some more* that you didn't take offense..(Terry, I love that sound you make when I do that)..at that drainage bang thing I said..Umm, may I COME IN?

(Submitted by Dal, Chiqca's Pal )

Ohhh Chiqca, you said a mouthful, girlfriend.

(Submitted by Dally-ance )

lieu, I'm touched...you remembered that cheeky little cacti of yore *wiping a tear aside*

(Submitted by in lieu of mead )

dal, I'm touched... *wiping a beer aside*

(Submitted by in lieu of jeeves )

GATORAVE, tomorrow knight, abi's place. BYOH(edgehog)

(Submitted by snatch the pebble beach, tiger )

Once I had a sick gator that needed some ade and so i fed him a catbird and a WEEKENDER and then he got better. Only then I found out he wasn't sick only pregnant by some Tim Tam from Dundee. So 24 oz later, on his Dew date, he had a sac full of crockies and we sold em on the black market to Mushu. Mrs. C, I think I love you, but I want to know for shore. Will you wave my swag?

(Submitted by Dal )

wow, we both touched simultaneously...oh lieu,*panting* I never knew it could be like this...*wiping aside a tableful of assundry items to the floor just like in 'The Postman Always Rings Twice' and hopping onto Terry's wooden*...wait..something is different here.

(Submitted by in lieu of tweed )

for Shore and seven years ago, our 4 father brought forth unto this continent a Pauly, and we've not recovered since. course only having 4 limbs on your family tree and being Pauly are pretty much one in the insane. shit, dal, i was just becoming your thigh master and lowering you ever so gently to the floor. how's bout the back of your '57 Chevy down by the levy (no, not strauss).

(Submitted by Dalliance )

what's a pauly, lieu? 'ever so gently?' that was nice..that sounded really very nice.

(Submitted by Pauly Shore )

Duh.

(Submitted by Little Moth )

I once had a bannana, now it's a cookie. What did Sam have before he got a cookie?

(Submitted by Abi )

lieu, Dal, Chiq, Terry et al - the GATORAVE sounds fab! I've got a couple of sacs of cookies in, and a copy of Weekender X, all I need now are the garlic balls, a DJ and I'm set - come on down!

(Submitted by Terry )

I'll bring the storage bags. (to BE confoozed with CONDOMS) P.S. Dal, thanks for the wood job.

(Submitted by Eull Gibbons )

i'm a master at working with wood.

(Submitted by Eull Gibbons )

Many parts of my pine tree are edible.

(Submitted by Dally )

Eull, working with wood so masterfully, is that how you got your grape nuts?

(Submitted by euell )

i'd like to stalk the wild asparagas.

(Submitted by euell )

nope, my cone which you pine for. hi dal. love me?

(Submitted by Stripper of Bark )

When you eat pine trees parts, does sap stick to the roof of your mouth, or is it just me?

(Submitted by OMG, I can't believe I am posting this )

How much wood, would a woodchick suck if a woodchick could suck wood?

(Submitted by lieu )

there once was a sultry vixen, a meal for her i was a' fixin, but she left in a rant, because under my pant, my richard looks a lot like nixon.

(Submitted by Dal - Morning Wood Nymph )

Euell, Do i love you? Does a squirrel eat nuts? Do bags have storage? Did Derek get screwed with that pricey 24oz Dew?

(Submitted by WalStiff )

OMG, i'm posting too.

(Submitted by in lieu of poo )

If nobody is there when the pope shits in the woods, does he make any noise?

(Submitted by Terry )

If "nobody" includes the pope, then no. But if he's been eating GATORADE and SAM'S SAC O' COOKIES, I'll guarantee you the squirrels are running for cover.

(Submitted by silly english kniggets )

how about the large wooden badgers?

(Submitted by Zookeeper )

Badgers ain't afraid of SH*T.

(Submitted by in lieu of zoo )

we don't need no st*nking badgers.

(Submitted by euell gibbons )

*creeping silently thru bushes looking for the ever- elusive woodchick* Did you know that many parts of the woodchick are edible?

(Submitted by elmer, euell's consonant-challenged brudder )

I taut I taw a puddychick! I tid! I tid!

(Submitted by in lieu of reed )

I used to have dreams of Jeanie. They were moist, even wet and seamy. I probably should repent, for continually pitching a tent, every morning with my wooden weenie.

(Submitted by Staring at Your Pecs )

It the flying nun pees in the woods, do the chickMONKS watch?

(Submitted by Speaking of Pecs )

What about the woodpeckers?

(Submitted by Wood Nymph )

wooden weenie *squealing with laughtert* I think I've roasted one or two of those before! woohoo..give me s'mores!!

(Submitted by walfix )

abi, we've got the garlic balls and are hoping you misspelled DJ.

(Submitted by lieu )

i love it when dal gets to squealing. my bannana gets just ripe for peeling. i've become her biggest fan, and am quite happy as a man, when my breeze makes her skirt more revealing.

(Submitted by in lieu of spew )

Our president makes my butt just pucker. He lies to us like we're a sucker. He never inhaled? Monica wasn't impaled? Oh come on, we all know he (read Leaves Of Grass to her).

(Submitted by he's on a roll )

If WEEKENDER X is a 10 pack of Depends, someone's planning on a real shitfit.

(Submitted by pita )

Why don't you ever pay with exact change? Do geranimal pants not have pockets?

(Submitted by Freud )

Mushu is the evil overlord of the minions of compubank.

(Submitted by Bonnie Piesse's lame chicken )

Dear Pita, you may be intrigued and delighted to know that Derek did pay exact change on 21 December 97. This was the day when he indulged in that most carnal of earthly delights, the carmex tube. I do believe, despite his better judgement, there were no duos, trojans, woodchicks, woodpeckers, grape nuts, nixons or pines in sight at the time.

(Submitted by Andre )

*still under the glass table top, waiting*

(Submitted by Bonnie Piesse's lame chicken )

I believe that operator 1717 must be a bit of a saucy wench. Derek, being still the young redblooded male that he is, got somewhat excited by the site of this comely vixen. In the car back home, all he could think of was 1717, so symmetrical, so perfectly proportioned, so balanced. When he withdrew the receipt from his trouser pocket, he didn't realise that its bottom corner bore the mark of his affection for sweet 1717. How quickly is Shannon forgotten, yet, how sweet and fragile is the blossoming of new love.

(Submitted by Dalliance )

*pressing my face against the glass table top looking down*

(Submitted by Dalliance )

*singing through the glass to Andre* "You don't bring me flowers anymoooorrreeeeee..*fogging up glass* *tear-drop*

(Submitted by Volare (I'm Just A Luv Machine) )

God Grief, all you potty minds, that spot is obviously motor oil from the Volare. Uncle Dad, will you tell us the story about checking the oil again? I just love that story. But go slow this time.

(Submitted by Tittle Moth )

How'd this table top get here,smaaacccck. . . . . . . . X

(Submitted by hello )

this is the day i got fired from wal mart

(Submitted by Abi )

walfix - you have the eye of an eagle, spulling was never a strong point of mine - so, where are these balls then??....let's GATORAVE!!

(Submitted by Dally-ance )

woohoo Abi..do you have a mosh pit we can all mosh about in? There is one particular receipter (I'll leave nameless) that I would just love to mosh with.

(Submitted by NekroSmurf )

WoW!!!! My first posting!!! **pant-pant** This site is so addictive...it's had me hooked for months..now I'm admitting this "I am addicted to Derek's wal-mart reciepts". I have made the first step.....now I will brave anything...........

(Submitted by Dalliance )

Woohoo...NekroSmurf...welcome to the fold *hugging you and pouring the ceremonial Mt. Dew over your head*

(Submitted by Chiqca )

Wow, I go away for a couple days, I come back & the chatter has gone on endlessly without me. Catch up time (totally different from ketchup time). Lieu, all the bananas are mine. Don't be sharing yours with anyone else, 'kay love? Don't be swayed by Dal's squealing. Abi, I've booked my airline ticket for the GATORAVE, do you have a spare condo I could stay in? Dally-ance, who is the receipter you most want to mosh with? You can can tell me, it'll be just betwixt us girls. And NekroSmurf, welcome to our incestuous little group. You clearly have much more self- control than the rest of us tho if you've been hooked for months & this is your first post. *tossing NekroSmurf a welcome banana*

(Submitted by Little Moth )

I was swimming in dew last night,ready to mosh today. Where did all this broken glass come from? Does anyone have an open container of bannana oil? I could use some! Also same cookies from downunder would bee nice.

(Submitted by Deliverance )

i love being a part of an incestous group...don't we have fun ya'll...what with all the tim tams and wood and bananas, dew, duos and white globes, and now, now, we have our very own NekroSmurf!! Life is sweet. Picking up my banjo and commencing to pluck out a few barettes of "Dueling Banjos".

(Submitted by Dal with an Apono Bulb over her head )

I think we should have a calendar with the "Men of WalMart Receipts" wearing skimpy little tool belts and/or kneehighs and such. What do you think ladies??? Big D on the Cover with his WEEKENDER X? lieu sporting a banana peel? Terry in a large habit? *fanning myself* Andre modeling his white kneehighs or perhaps a tight-fitting pair of Spanky pants? lexicOn draped in a spread sheet? NekroSmurf a la DriBottoms (Smurfs wear diapers,right?) Freud reclining on a couch avec cigar? Balmain Boy proudly raising high his torch....oh my...my woodchick is beginning to stir. Haiku in something cumulous?

(Submitted by in lieu of reed )

thanks bonnie, i'm pleased to know that derek has indulged in some carmex knowledge and also pleased to see so many active posters. me thinks this site is starting to resemble a tropical forest, what with all the bannanas, hardwoods and pliable rubber products. speaking of, i wonder if those were firestones on that concorde? i know, but i'm already going to hell anyway so i might as well have fun on the way. (geranimals, aim-n-shame)

(Submitted by Devil's Daughter )

oh lieu, you mean you'll be there too?? Perhaps if we are evil enuff we might get to boil in the same pot together.

(Submitted by lieu )

dal, i'd hesitate to take you "together", cuz it'll undoubtably be stormy weather, course i'd likely change my mind, if'n the skin you're wearing is the kind, that is labeled "GENUINE CALF LEATHER."

(Submitted by respectfully yours, i promise )

i once new a gal named abi, and her looks were none too shabby, in general her privates were taken, and to tread there you'd be far mistaken, but i'd like to think they resembled ol' tabby.

(Submitted by in lieu of mr. magoo )

i also knew a beauty named Chiquita, and her pocket i wanted wasn't the pita, but in a fit of distress, i settled for less, and just fixed her a salty margarita.

(Submitted by in lieu of clouds )

the rest of you i know none too well, and while i'm sure you're quite swell, our relationship i'd surely botch, cuz just look at your watch, i'm about to go straight to hell.

(Submitted by lieucifer )

jeez, they've got some kick-ass barbeque down here!

(Submitted by goodnight loving tail )

now i really do have to take a pee, what's in front of me is just way too funny, Regis' last answer, about who this crazy prancer, with a cross running at me is Kathi Lee!

(Submitted by Little Moth )

Let me be the first to wish you a Happy Grandparents' Day. We should roll Nekrosmurf in a storage bag to pass around at the party. Mrs. C the card has been <posted>.

(Submitted by Hanun )

I was bored, so I came to this site, read pages and saw the light, I laughed and I cried and then put it aside, because I stayed up half of the night! ...I loved woodshop! Oh, please pass the gatoraid.

(Submitted by Hanun )

Oh give me a home, On the internet zone, where reciepts can be read all day long. Where seldom is heard, a discouraging word, from the guy who posted this site. This site, this site is so cool, where chaquita makes dalliance drool, where seldom is heard a sain conversationalist's word, and this place gets my useless site vote!

(Submitted by Dalliance )

Hanun,love your poetry but I'm a girl and it's not Chiquita that makes me drool, although no doubt she is droolable, just not my fruit of choice, if you get what I mean. and lieu, help me, 'take me 'together?' errrr, huh? Hey, where are Andre and Terry??

(Submitted by Spill Magic )

Terry, did you get your teeth yet? *sketching more imaginary pictures...tight waist, biceps built to carry a girl to bed..lips to die for, sexy scars, pirate eyes, abs to do your laundry on* Say Abi, now many of these would you like?

(Submitted by Terry )

Not yet, I still have to gum every thing I eat...over and over again. Hey, who needs an oil change?

(Submitted by Little Moth )

That's really bright, what a delight.

(Submitted by Chiquita )

Just for the record, I am quite drool-worthy. Just ask Sam & his cookie.

(Submitted by Britney Spears )

Did everybody see me at the MTV Awards the other night? Wouldn't you just love to "Do the Dew" with me?

(Submitted by Mrs Campbell )

Hello hello hello, here I am, all these Tim Tams, yes, Little Moth, there's plenty to spare for my receipt posting junkie friends, though mamma never told me to consort with drunkards, tipstaffs and waterberries, I will give you a Tim Tam each nonetheless. And yes, I even got the card for Grandparent's Day, it is so lovely little moth, and you even covered it in my favourite doily lace too, you're such a gem, though I don't quite understand what "bury it in your warm labial interstices" really means. But you're welcome to come over here and explain in more detail. I am sooooooooooooooooooooooo excited, the torch is about to pass my house today, oh my heart's aflutter, will my Tim Tams be up to the standard of the man giving the water to the person next to the driver of the convoy vehicle? I have been able to sleep with the worry! But I know it will all be worth it, the Olympic spirit burns brightly in my rather large but nonetheless nestlable bosom, I have my best drapery on today, and the hankies have all been tested for flutterability, they seem perfect, but do you know how hard it is to embroider the face of Juan Antonio Samaranch onto a square of cloth not even big enough to wipe my copious bottom cheeks on? Frustration, but the tips I learnt in Mrs Clitsore's sewing class in the second grade, the foundation of all my millinery skills, once again came to the rescue. Beading can cover a multitude of ugly stitching disasters! Oh pray for me one and all, I do so want to get my hand on that torch, I will touch it just once, and maybe those itchy spots will clear up, they did so irritate Mr Campbell when he was

(Submitted by Van Cough )

Hey, love the framed art in the BBS, Der

(Submitted by PickleHead )

Matt Krieg still works at WalMart? I wonder if he gets lots of prank calls? I wonder if he has gotten a raise?!

(Submitted by Abi )

Dal, Chiq - the mosh pit's ready and waiting - let's thrash girls! Who's up for it boyz?? Respectfully - thanks for the poem, I've never had one before - *touched* Dal - I do like the idea of a calendar, please, please send all the sketches at once - I've got the UK Terry Fan Club under way...now back to that calendar idea - need someone to take the photos *hands up in the air*!!

(Submitted by dorothy double dozen )

i did oz 24 times.

(Submitted by munchkin )

i did dorothy 24 times.

(Submitted by toto )

i humped the munchkin's leg 24 times.

(Submitted by honey dew )

love the logo!

(Submitted by Terry )

I need GATORADE *sweating profusely*

(Submitted by (Dally) Prop Lover )

Abi, I think it would definitely be worth the trip over to do the photo sessions...but perhaps we should split up..shall I do the Aussie leg? And since the men are spread far and wide across the map, perhaps Chicqa should do the west coast? East coast would be yours. I'll be the dispatch and all around prop girl *she says with a twinkle in her eye*

(Submitted by Dalliance )

melon? where are you...we need you for the July spread. (or whenever it is that melon are best pic-ed) teeheehee - get it...pic as in photo..sorry.

(Submitted by walfix )

can i be the key grip or best boy?

(Submitted by Scarface )

So tell us, Mr. D. How was the WEEKENDER X? Did you remember to use a STORAGE BAG? Or did you dip the SAC COOKIES into the DEW unprotected?

(Submitted by in lieu of winter )

Can I be one of the summer months because of, you know, shrinkage?

(Submitted by in lieu of two (legs) )

You girls feel more than welcome to utilize my tripod and wide-angle lens to capture the look and feel you're hoping for.

(Submitted by Terry )

Dal, how 'bout you just trust us to send in a picture of ourselves, or do you just WANT a picture of a tattooed, toothless, beer-bellied biker, wearing his good jeans waaay below the crack of his arse?

(Submitted by mellow yellow )

Now fair's fair. Us guys would like to see a "Tarts of WalMart" calendar expose too. Let's see... Chiq, Abi, Dalliance, Suz, Ms. Maam and Campbell, Twinkella, Brittany, who else?

(Submitted by Grip this )

Terry..YES, or in other words...YES!! lieu..*laughing and doing the frame thing with my hands* You would be the perfect June spread. Walfix, you can hold the Keyweiser in your duo belt.

(Submitted by Dal )

where is that tatoo, by the way?

(Submitted by susieonprozac )

:):):):):):):):) Can I dress up warmly in the carpjeans and the garanimal shirt and be the February pin- up?

(Submitted by susieonprozac )

What about a shot of Dal and Chiquita on the Trojan horse holding a few white globes for Christmas?

(Submitted by in lieu of mr. ed. )

Sure, they can get on me anytime.

(Submitted by Green Card Warrior )

I saw some Trojan whores in Tijuana last week that also had multiple men comming out after dark.

(Submitted by in lieu of Beaver. )

June spread? As in Cleaver?

(Submitted by the beav )

aaah wally! why do i always have to be on the bottom? i'm not a wabbit... i need some west!

(Submitted by June )

Silly Rabbit, tricks are for Ward.

(Submitted by Eddie Haskell )

Save a tree. Eat a beaver.

(Submitted by screw chastity )

So Derek's master of his own domainname?

(Submitted by Tim )

I know where you shop. Its the Dilworth WalMart on Highway 10, right outside the North Dakota state line. I'll be watching.

(Submitted by big brother & the scolding country )

great george, an orwellian walmart in dilworth?

(Submitted by Heidigger's GPS )

If a bar of soap fell in the North Dakota State Prison shower and someone bent over to pick it up, would anyone hear them when they screamed?

(Submitted by Irish Thingy )

Strong enough for a man but made for a woman?

(Submitted by Someone )

The damn guards sure didn't.

(Submitted by Ellen Degenerate )

Aye, butt I like it too.

(Submitted by is that your final polyester? )

Ever notice how half the guys in the walmart parking lot are in tank tops and sporting a mullet and a scrawny child- molester mustache?

(Submitted by achy fart )

silly ray sire-us must still be popular with the walcrowd.

(Submitted by jim bridger )

still searching for the elusive woodchick pelt.

(Submitted by Lever to Beaver )

what's a mullet? Is that like a Swedish Fish? That soap thingie was hysterical, but I myself prefer Lifebuoy with a little Lever 2000.

(Submitted by tidy bowl feller )

i'm just the little man in the boat.

(Submitted by Zest for a good Lux )

Then again, Lava can be fun too.

(Submitted by Zest )

I mean in certain circumstances

(Submitted by in lieu of class )

a mullet's a yambo that wears his hair short on the top 'n sides but real long in back, like superfreak billy ray cyrus. they're the only ones who don't know just how awful they look, in fact most of them go to great lengths (sorry) to cultivate this foolish appearance. the "mullet" is frequently accompanied by a gold chain, child-molester mustache, camaro, or public air-guitar displays. there aren't any more mullets in southern states than northern, just that many southern female mullets are indistinguishable from their brothers.

(Submitted by mellow yellow )

LAVA! What are you trying to get, clean or dirty?

(Submitted by lieu )

seeing women mud-wrasslin doesn't do a thing for me. but if'n they were all squishing around wif each other in a big bowl of palmolive... well now missy, that's a different story altogether. heck, even madge might look good in that.

(Submitted by in lieu of view )

is it true that everything looks 20% bigger underwater? no wonder baywatch is so popular. any gals need a water weenie?

(Submitted by walfix )

where can i get one of those box lunches i've been hearing about?

(Submitted by lester bob archambeau )

forget baywatch. gulf shores, alabama's got the calendar's summer months locked up.

(Submitted by D. Hasselhuff )

But lieu, things also *shrink* 30 % underwater, so it doesn't even out. And let's not even get into cold water.

(Submitted by hefty )

I think i would have to eat a bullet. The trigger i'd not hesitate to pull it, If because of my barber, I found that i harbor, Anything that resembles a mullet.

(Submitted by in lieu of dew )

remember pamela, just add water and stir to taste.

(Submitted by mellow yellow )

okay, sand is in large part silica, right? SiO2. And many parts of baywatch are silicone too, right? sooo... it's really like they're just returning all those silicates to their natural environment, right? (not that there's anything "natural" about any part of that show) hell, euell gibbons would starve to death on that beach.

(Submitted by george brett )

many parts of pine tar are not palatable.

(Submitted by honus wagner )

i'm such a card

(Submitted by susieonprozac )

The bit about the mullets is fasc in at in gg .

(Submitted by good night luving tail )

i think i'm having an anxiety prozac

(Submitted by Dr. Scarface )

Here...breathe into this STORAGE BAG.

(Submitted by footlong and a bag o' nuts )

okay... aaarraaauuuggghhhhh!!!! i can't breathe!!!

(Submitted by mulletude )

other names for mullets: 7 (the shape of the number), 10-90 (changes in numbers proportion to the amount of hair on top and in the back) achy-breaky-bad-mistakey, ape drape, beaver paddle, camaro cut, canadian passport, kentucky waterfall, squirrel pelt and yep-nope

(Submitted by webbie )

gonna print this out and see what happens when i scan that big barcode with my freebie Radio Shack barcode scanner.

(Submitted by Taurus )

Bet you end up at Walmart.com

(Submitted by glowworm )

Up here in Minnesota, home of Dilworth, we call it Hockey Hair.

(Submitted by Dally )

oh...I see, a mullet is a party mane!!!

(Submitted by Suds Up )

mellow, just saying men in prison aren't the only ones that pick up the occasional..em...bar.

(Submitted by Pink Pony )

lieu? a water wienie? Is that like a Super Soaker?

(Submitted by rainy )

i've been reading all these receipts quietly for a week now,and i have to say that i love you all, even though you're all potty mouths!

(Submitted by in lieu of reed )

rainy, what day have you quietly been saving it for?

(Submitted by in lieu of alcindor )

There once was a Knight named Bobby. Bullying kids had become the coach's hobby. Just to win a game, his own players he would shame. Now both his heads are looking for a jobby.

(Submitted by in lieu of sue )

It's likely my mouth is suited for the potty. I guess I'm risque and somewhat naughty. Like panties, my poot's in my mouth. My moral compass points to the south. And my bright ideas only rate 60 watty.

(Submitted by Mr. Edgar Gutrumble )

okay, okay, okay. if heidigger's kitty pinched a loaf in the north dakota state prison shower, how would it cover it up?

(Submitted by Mrs Campbell )

*sniff! HONNNNNKKKKK!* None of youse cares, none of youse! Right in the middle of a posting I got this strange feeling in my left temple, the sky started swirling, I saw red and purple stars, and the next thing I know, I'm looking up at Dr Silvertong and his bag black stethoscope! Oh my teacosy, I cry, have I missed it, have I missed the torch? I'm sorry, Mrs C, but you were overcome with emotion and the excessive exertion of making pseudonymous postings on a loser website, you've been in a temporary coma for the last 24 hours. Oh my goodness, I cry, oh my number 12 knitting needles! How could I have let everyone down! Thank the big one for Florrie Winkpuss, the grand niece from heaven, she singlehandedly took it upon herself (and she did it alone, too) to wave all 4,372,876 hankies at the brave Olympic torch bearer! A difficult task, but nonetheless she fulfilled the Campbell/Winkpuss destiny. And she met a nice Finnish torchbearer too, name of Fükka Tonkkatoi. It looks like true love, I do believe, my heart trembles once again, I must make sure I follow doctor's orders and keep down on all fours, with my head lowered, and sniffing those delightful smelling salts that smell like Mr C's armpits after a hard day shovelling chook po

(Submitted by Mrs Campbell )

No, not another palpitation, just this f%##%$! pain I get in my lower abdomen every time I try to straighten up, yeeow, Dr Silvertong, haven't you finished yet????

(Submitted by Abi )

God, I can't believe I missed you guys yeterday - internet constipation or something, just couldn't connect - any road up - Dal, I'm up for the East Coast Shoot, how many're we talking here, will I need back up (Rosie's been too quiet recently, and needs to get out) - Chiq, you can have my pad in Strumpet-Shire for the UK leg, and Terry - I am sure we've met in a previous life!! Well, mellow - I think we're all game on for the Tarts of WalMart, can I do a sort of Brittania WalMart representation?? Sitting on the Chore Boy holding the Aim N Flame?? Wearing my Union Jack crash helmet - huh?

(Submitted by toby b. )

i love your latest receipt. It was so groovy how you first got two bags of cookies and then DID the DEW!!!! that was sooooooo cool!

(Submitted by Terry )

Are you sure Abi? In my previous life, I was a female hooker in Kansas City named Ophelia ...Hey, I do remember you... you owe me four bucks!

(Submitted by Abi )

Oops - sorry, I thought I left the change on the bedside cabinet, do you take euros?? I'd hate to be in debt to a hairy-assed biker!!

(Submitted by Ophelia Bottom )

Euros, chinese, mexicans, italians, hell, us hairy- assed bikers will take anything...

(Submitted by Chiquita )

lieu, loooove your idea for Tarts of Wal*Mart calendar. I'm all over that. I've always wanted to be a pin-up girl. 2 requests, tho... I want to be August and I have to be able to pose with my banana. But just to show I'm a good sport, I'll let you place the banana wherever you see fit. Do we have any posters in Hawaii? 'cause as the "west coast photographer" for the guys' calendar, I can make a swoop through the islands. Abi, I love the sound of Strumpet-Shire!!! Why does't California have any cool-sounding places like that??? Me and my nanners are on the way...

(Submitted by Chiqca )

Suz, I'm afraid I have to shoot down your idea of me & Dal on the Trojan Horse together (not that there's anything wrong with that). No offense Dal, you're my gal- pal & all, but if'n I'm sharing that horse with anyone, it's gonna be someone equipped with a tool set, if you get my drift.

(Submitted by Abi )

Hell - this is getting funnier! Ophelia - down boy/girl - here have a sacrificial strumpet, I don't want to get on your bad side! Chiq - I'm airing the spare linen as I type - bring whomever you want ! Plus - even tho' I'm a Leo too, I'll let you have August, the banana is just too perfect - can I be in the Autumn then, that's definitely my colours...

(Submitted by Dalliance )

QUICK!!! Some *pant pant* one hand me a *pantpantpant* STORAGE BAG. I'm hyper *pantpantpantpant* ventilating. I have seen the other side...and it is O. M. G. *passing out*

(Submitted by Abi )

Gawd - are you okay babes!?!! Quick, Mrs C - flap Dal with your bloomers, somebody doooo something.......*running 'round like a headless chicken* p.s. Dal - what does the other side look like?

(Submitted by Colonel Scarface Sanders )

Would someone please give that chicken some head. Or at least a HUMAN SKULL.

(Submitted by chicken licken )

cluck !!

(Submitted by Chiqca )

Quick! lieu, Terry, Andre, mellow, hefty, SOMEBODY! Toss Dal an ankle, or er, uhh, er, you know, a tool set or something to revive her.

(Submitted by a hefty in the rye )

How about an ass sandwich? I know maybe it's not the best piece of ass she's ever had butt if'n we knew the "other side of what" we'd better be able to propose a treat mint.

(Submitted by in lieu of meuw )

me thinks if she'd assume mrs. c's position of down on all fours, i could have her feeling much better in a not-so-short time. or maybe aqua-treatment is the answer. come on dal, let's go down to the pool and do the doggie-style... errr, excuse me... the doggie-paddle.

(Submitted by walfix )

aren't you suppossed to breathe into an empty bag if you hyperventilate? quick, someone call shirly mclaine!

(Submitted by Terry )

I guess it's my turn...OK, how 'bout some mouth to...um...lessee, which orifice was I s'posed to blow into again?

(Submitted by Dally In Starlight )

*raising head* now, lieu, cupcake, how am i gonna assume the all fours position if I'm passed out? Or do you have extensive dating experience with this? *clunk..re-fainting* *thinking to self...jeeze, don't these people know CPR? pretty stars... darkness*

(Submitted by Napping )

Oh Terry, my Hero...and he's sooo romantic to boot. I just love when a man says that magic word to me. Orifice. *spine tingling, starry eyes*

(Submitted by Gang Bang Revival )

"My turn??? My turn??" Did I faint on a pinball machine or sumthing?

(Submitted by Chiquita )

Ok, this is totally not WM- related, but what gets to me is when a man says the word "delicious." Just had to throw that out there. Feel free to use it for your own purposes, guys. OH! I just had a thought. If a man said the word "delicious" in a sexy foreign language, like spanish or french. You know what I mean, girls?

(Submitted by Chiqca )

Hey, where have Balmain Boy & Bjorn been lately? Come back to us... We have cookie for each of you.

(Submitted by Terry el Diablo )

Here Chicqu, have some delicious SAMS COOKIES, wash it down with some delicious DEW or delicious GATORADE, and later, if I could interest you in a delicious WEEKENDER X, I'll bring el delicioso el STORAGIO BAGGIOS.

(Submitted by Chiqca swooning )

Dear heavens, Ter. You really know how to get to me right where it counts. Could someone please hand me a tissue or dri-bottoms, please. *fanning flushed face*

(Submitted by Baby Shmp )

ANDREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE WERE ARE YOU!

(Submitted by Baby Shmp )

WHERE, EVEN

(Submitted by susieonprozac )

Will the real Chiquita PLEASE GET ON THE TROJAN HORSE !!!!!!!!!!!!

(Submitted by rainy )

hey dalliance...i just saw derry's pic on his homepage. i want to pick up where you left off on your lust pages! he's a hottie!!!

(Submitted by Dalliance )

Derek...my Derek...left off??? Wait...but wait..yes, isn't he a doll. And not only doll but an awesome man...smart, sexy, sensitive, funny, never met a better parent...I miss him. I really miss him...He's the real thing.

(Submitted by Dalliance (snickerless) )

rainy, I gotta give it to you, you have excellent taste...he's the real stuff.

(Submitted by Dal...... )

charming..did I mention charming...damn, I am jealous, but, well...ok, rainy..you are probably a much better girl that me and Derek deserves the very best. Sexy, did I mention sexy? He's sexy. Yeah, he is.

(Submitted by And he buys cool stuff too )

I love Derek. Derek, I love you.

(Submitted by Barney Fife )

I think I last saw my bullet in Indiana.

(Submitted by RD Taylor )

Lord, I can't go back there.

(Submitted by Abi )

Chiq - just nipping back a fews posts - for me, it would have to be an italian accent - delicious!! (Failing that south london would do...)

(Submitted by I am watching you!!! )

I think that this is so cool!!! I think that it is neat to see all of the things you bought and the times that you bought them and the cashier that checked you out and the manager that is in charge and well you are a stalkers dream

(Submitted by Dalliance )

Don't worry prozac susie, I know you have a low tolerance for me, so I won't bore you 'going back there' Have yourself just a great day. May God bless all your sacs.

(Submitted by Abi )

Dal - no noise from ol' Andre yet? The last I heard he was doing 'something' with a one armed bandit...not sure quite what he meant...you know guys!

(Submitted by Lou Ford )

www.louford.com

(Submitted by susieonprozac )

:):):):) Dear Dalliance, I now see that you are all really nice people, and I love Dereks site, and I am really sorry about the 1 in 3 Americans thing, and Chiq not knowing where Russia is. Hell, I dont know where Indiana is

(Submitted by Dal )

No Abi, and I'm worried...I hope that one armed bandit wasn't one of those greedy sort that repeatedly return to the crime spot (see corner of receipt above) . Can a one-armed bandit have tied our Andre up somewhere? I know he likes that sometimes but I usually let him go after a certain amount of time and a few bars of pine tar soap. He sings real nice. I'm having guy troubles..first Derek disappears and now Andre...*bottom lip trembling*

(Submitted by Dally )

Oh Susie, Chiquita knows where Russia is, she was referring to the break-up of the USSR, that's what she meant by Russia (as I understood her anyway). Now, regarding Indiana...errrrr...I'm not exactly sure where that is either :)

(Submitted by Auntie Abi )

Oh Dal - don't despair - he's probably buffing his boots up real nice for you, I'm sure he'll be back soon, those one-armed games wear off after a while - now lieu, you naughty boy, you haven't been introducing that nice young man to absinthe have you??

(Submitted by Chiquita )

I can always count on my gal- pal Dal to understand me. I admit I did refer to the entire "U.S.S.R." as "Russia" and I know that is a hopelessly "American" thing to do.... but SURPRISE, suzie, I'm 100% American. As well as blonde, so that only complicates matters further. Always remember everbody, anything you say CAN & WILL be used against you later by someone who never forgets!!! Be very careful what you utter... no matter how harmless you think it is. Now, can I have a facial tissue please... my banana is starting to get mushy.

(Submitted by Chiqca )

And FYI, I'm pretty sure Indiana doesn't exist anymore either.

(Submitted by Chiqca )

Mornin' everybody! Got my rant out of the way for the day... it's a downhill coast from here. *yawning annoyingly loud*

(Submitted by Abi )

Blonde is lovely and don't you forget it....where is America?

(Submitted by Dally...Yet Another North Amercian Blonde )

In the States USSR has always been synonymous with "Russia". It's a cold war thang. Like The United States of America is synonymous with "America" when really, we Americans actually do all understand that we're just North Americans as we sadly, have no llamas and our soccer (football to the rest of the world) team rather sucks.

(Submitted by Peter the Great )

It's where all the Brits without a delicious accent came.

(Submitted by Chiqca )

*melting* Oh, you're killing me. There's that word again. Can anyone say it in Italian? If you can, I'll give you a sac of cookies.

(Submitted by Ronald Reagan )

The USSR broke up?

(Submitted by Abi....Brunette with a delicious accent )

Dal - no llamas, oh no - I thought you had giraffes too - so what are Garanimals, and do they roam across central park in migrating herds??

(Submitted by Delicious Peter with the Great orifice )

Alas, Abi. Tis only the crips and the bloods that do that.

(Submitted by WR Hearst )

editor's note- Garanimals are colour and pattern pre- coordinated outfits popular with toddlers, pre- adolescents and anyone that ever owned a silk disco shirt.

(Submitted by Vinnie Testes-verde )

"Delicious" *flailing arms about wildly*

(Submitted by in lieu of two )

"Orificious"

(Submitted by Hummingbird )

woohoo lieu.....that's using your head...talk about killing to birds with one bone!

(Submitted by Hummmmmmmm )

damn, two not to...I hate when I screw up the punch line...speaking of which, can someone hand me some gatorade...I have something I need to quench.

(Submitted by Sylvester Stallone )

"Wawicious" *flailing pecs about stupidly*

(Submitted by Gator McCluskey )

Here, little airborne pollinator. Try some Pickleade instead. Heck, it worked for the philly beagles two weeks ago when the turf temp was 171 at Texas Stadium.

(Submitted by Peter the Great )

I need something to divide and conquor.

(Submitted by Peter the Mediocre )

dal, what was on the other side, anyway?

(Submitted by Pelle )

ditto.

(Submitted by Peter, Peter, pumpkin eater. )

Come here, pumpkin.

(Submitted by Charles Eastman )

Okay, I'm here for the WalTart photo shoot. What lighting and speed settings do you gals prefer? Any props? Who's got the SAE 10- 40. OMG! What in the hell is that???

(Submitted by Chiqca )

What's the problem, Chaz. It's just my banana. Haven't ya ever seen a mushy nanner before?

(Submitted by Len Zangle )

It's not just that Carmen Miranda. I'm talking about the whole basket. Does that require a learner's permit, leash or bar code in any of the 50 states?

(Submitted by Henauder Titzoff )

Don't let it get too hot in the sun. Here, use this tanner nanner fanner.

(Submitted by Dally in Dallyland )

Dear Peter, Gosh, all I remember is stars of the most glorious nature...Did we pick a month out for me? I should like to a wood nymph frolicking about a large wood with small flowers entwined in my hair.

(Submitted by Fruits of the World Unite )

mushy nanner?? *laughing my little pumpkin off*

(Submitted by Dalliance )

Either that or riding pillion on some pillionable thingie.

(Submitted by in lieu of rue )

you take the highway pylon, i'll take the low.

(Submitted by in lieu of Patch Sadams )

if an iraqi dictator has sex with a cantelope, does that make him a melon felon?

(Submitted by WalTart poster child )

Dal, how about May? Guinevere did say it was the lusty month and besides, it forever continues to beg the question, as in "May I?"

(Submitted by Carmen )

Chiquita, how about July, as in "July in the California sun all day and you're gonna get your mushy nanner tanner"?

(Submitted by Wendy Bottoms )

Abi, did you mention August, as in "Watch out for August of southern wind or we'll see your privates in general"?

(Submitted by Paul Hogan Kisses )

Mrs. Campbell, we'd love to see you Marching in a parade with or w/o a torch to bare.

(Submitted by dr quack )

Susie, does April of Prozac and I'm pretty prolific work for you?

(Submitted by tarty bell )

Anybody want to pose for a winter month in a wet suit?

(Submitted by Chiqca )

I dunno. What's the suit wet with?

(Submitted by xxx )

Today is 9/13/00.. 7 days after this receipt.. it took 23 minutes to scroll to the end of the comments

(Submitted by yyy )

speed reader!

(Submitted by Cue Kumber )

Pickleade.

(Submitted by zzz )

Mmmmmmmmmm... pickleade! Deeeeeeeeelicious!

(Submitted by Cue Kumber )

Partner, how long's it been since you had a heapin' helping frothy glass of Ranch Style Pickleade? Huh? Well Daughter, that's been toooo long!

(Submitted by Cue Kumber )

I once had a dilliciously tart pickle. My innards they first began to tickle. Then I couldn't help butt flex it, Because upon it's exit... My orifice puckered to the size of a nickel.

(Submitted by Dal )

May is a nice month.

(Submitted by Spill Magic )

and if the dictator then says he is forbidden to run away and marry melon cause she's no longer a virgin, does that make him a canteloper?

(Submitted by in lieu of the que )

It turns out that I'm a WeakEnder. To a loss-of- control I surrender. But I don't go to the store, To buy Depends anymore. I just find a coin-operated Butt Vendor.

(Submitted by melon patch sadams )

yep, and that first night she's a honey dew.

(Submitted by Elvis )

I once ate a truckload of melons unhuh

(Submitted by rainy )

what's this?!? indiana does too exist!!!

(Submitted by rainy )

dalliance, i think we should ask derek if he wants to have a threesome at walmart sometime...

(Submitted by Dalliance )

Rainy-baby, okay, sounds like a great idea!!! Wonder if he would be interested??? Hummm...now, in which department do you think we should begin?? Go, ahead, Rainy...ask him *nudging you and giggling*

(Submitted by Barney Fife )

I can shoot a flame off an aim and flame in Indiana,with my good eye shut. **sniff**sniff**

(Submitted by in lieu of sanity )

my guess would be kitchen appliances. you know... spatulas, lemon juicers, egg beaters, etc. and then there's the whole kitchen island thing...

(Submitted by Terry )

Yeah, but the automotive department has all kinds of lubricants, ropes, trailer hitches, chains, FUNnels, BIG batteries, and shop towels...or am I the only one who uses these?

(Submitted by Tim Tam Taylor )

Aaahrr, aaahrr, aaahrr!

(Submitted by Chiquita )

No no no! It's gotta be large appliances (that's where the washing machines are *wink wink* with the spin cycle). And Terry, I'm a little worried about you. Trailer hitches????? I don't even want to know what happens. Did you hit your head very hard in that bicycle accident??

(Submitted by a null airstream )

regarding trailer hitches, i certainly hope so.

(Submitted by lieu )

you too, eh chiq? i'm glad i twern't the only one not employing that device. now, the batteries... that sounded pretty cool.

(Submitted by lieu )

or is a trailer hitch some sort of a leather strap-on device?

(Submitted by Terry )

What accident?

(Submitted by Abi )

If you take one of the feet off of the washing machine it really does rock.....so I hear.....

(Submitted by Abi )

Not being a native - I don't know, but do WalMart sell waterbeds?

(Submitted by Dalliance )

Ummm Terry...Maybe I really am a sensual extremist cuz I know *exactly* what I would want to do with that trailer hitch...and the rope and the chain and the 10 W 40...throw in some jumper cables and one of those 'roll under the car cart' thingies and I would be striding toward Nirvana!

(Submitted by May Tag )

Abi, you mean the washing machines in Strumpet-Shire have feets??

(Submitted by Devil's Daughter )

no lieu...that's a term often confused but the leather strap-on is called, not a trailer hitch, but a 'tail-er bitch', least that is what I call mine. But then,maybe that's just me.

(Submitted by lieu )

abi, what do you mean by native... someone who sleeps nekkid? and sweetest dal, that 'roll under the car cart' thingies is called a "dolly" tho the logic escapes me cuz ms. parton is the one individual that probably could slide under the least number of cars. look mom, no hands! but the visual you've created of a boudoir cart will surely stay wif me forever. oh, and also i beg your parton...

(Submitted by in lieu of pants )

i'd like to star in "return of the native". didn't hardy write that? ha, that's too ironic.

(Submitted by Terry )

No Abi, I've never seen a WAL*MART that sells waterbeds. But if you're in the market for a new bed, (oh no...here we go again) be careful, because a friend of mine recently bought a new bed, and she...I...I...I can't do it. I jus' can't. I won't.

(Submitted by weepless in she paddle )

DO IT!

(Submitted by wf )

put it on lay-away?

(Submitted by The Pharoah's Love Tent )

Come on in....have a swig of ice-cold Dew......maybe a bite of ass sandwich......

(Submitted by Chiqca )

I'd like a little nibble of ass sandwich, please. By the way, whose ass is it this time? Cuz the last one was a little rubbery.

(Submitted by Peter the Great )

That would be me, Chiq. Care for some head cheese with that? Hold my pickle, won't you lettuce...

(Submitted by Nemesis )

Yo....what's that spot on there? Did you have a little "pleasure-time" with your Mountain Dew and cookies? Oh, I see...your cookies did not have any "frosting" on them so you made your own! Good for you!

(Submitted by NYCFASHIONGIRL )

I LOVE ME SOME SUGAR!

(Submitted by facialtissue )

WEKENDER X- I've seen that porn flick. It sucks in my opinion!!