Visitor Comments:

(Submitted by Becca)

What is SOFY*GATE ..? is that one of those kids saftey doorway blocker thingys..?

(Submitted by vanessa)

you seem to buy quite a bit of Scotts Soil.

(Submitted by derek)

I have a green thumb (or I at least pretend it by having lots of green plants hiding the dying, sick plants). Maybe I should add up how much soil I've bought over the years -- see how many tons of dirt have passed through my apartment...

(Submitted by HOKU)

So, you bought a maxi shield?

(Submitted by rebecca)

ha

(Submitted by Rem)

its a long way to the top if you want to rock and roll

(Submitted by hdj jewboy)

i used to have a MAXI shield. it provided me with 100 Hitpoints. Then i sold it to buy an Ultra shield for 500 Gold at the town market. It's super effective! YAY!

(Submitted by poky)

I was laughing my ass off when I saw you playing in the street with your maxi, hdj. Don't pretend you sold it in town for gold though. I saw you give it to that homeless guy for a sip of his hooch.

(Submitted by jba)

I feel stuid even looking at this.

(Submitted by slo)

and you should!

(Submitted by Ryan)

I bought a plant saucer once, but I seem to remember it was a bit more expensive.

(Submitted by Yoinks)

Humm..a maxi shield, eh? coughcoughissuescoughcough

(Submitted by polack)

The UPC code for the soft gate is 000000000026. Does that mean that it was the 26th thing that WalMart inventoried?

(Submitted by SonikBaby)

isnt maxi shields for people who shit there pants???!!

(Submitted by Sonikbaby)

Is'nr maixi sheilds for people who shit there pants?

(Submitted by somebody)

i think i'm starting to understand my own underlying madness

(Submitted by Geek)

Does this guy buy a lot of soil, or what!?

(Submitted by Agent - XJ7)

This man is obviously an alien. He is buying Flying Plant Saucers and fueling them with Scotts Soil Fuel. Further evidence is presented with his re-entry protection system, Maxi Shields.

(Submitted by Sith)

WOW look at all that soil. You'd think he was hosting a womens mud wrestling match at his place or something.

(Submitted by äàéù)

îîù îåæø

(Submitted by ray)

this ol boy has buried his entire family out back and doesn't like the smell of putrifying flesh.

(Submitted by john)

no, the 000000000026 thing is just a way of wal-mart itemizing things on sale

(Submitted by Christiaan)

You are one freaked bastard! But really cool anyway

(Submitted by Rob)

Dear Morons: Maxi-shield is a feminine hygenie product. Derek has the cohones to go to Wal-Mart and buy Maxi pads for his special lady, which is a cool thing.

(Submitted by girlyboy)

I love a man who buys maxi pads, and can tell the world about it.

(Submitted by SUSIE)

ARE YOU USING ALL THAT SOIL AS CAT LITTER? OR PUTING A GRASS ROOF ON YOUR HOUSE?

(Submitted by reallyannoyed)

what kind of a town name is Dilworth, MN??? and jba, if u fell stupid looking at this, why are you, anyway???

(Submitted by nope)

Enlighten your special lady. Tampons are the wave of the future

(Submitted by Trevor)

Obviously his wife just had a kid, and can't use tampons yet. I will bet we'll see some in the future.

(Submitted by Tazzy)

I have moved on to tampons. Do those Maxi Pads come with wings? Are they super- absorbant? Oh the good ol' days...

(Submitted by leh)

Did you ever dream of how much response you would get from this site? Whether the comments are positive or not, this site is certainly entertaining. Some of the funniest comments come from the negative thinkers. They are so set on putting you or your site down that they don't pay much attention to their spelling. Don't they know that missing letters or typos take away from the impact of their insult? Anyway, I've enjoyed reading the "can of worms" your site has opened up.

(Submitted by Steve)

whazz up!

(Submitted by Cera)

Maaannn..........i can't believe i've actually been looking at this for the past 30 minute, but hey it's a cool but pointless site. OH well it rocks. KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK

(Submitted by shnookums)

i love bulbs

(Submitted by Magnolia)

This is the funniest thing i have ever set my eyes upon...i am entranced. I don't care what the others say, hysterical. You should be on letterman or something. The maxi pad comments people have made are giving me cramps from laughter. Thank you, I so needed this comic relief and I am sending this sight to everyone i know!

(Submitted by mark)

I'll take the easy joke bait and say, "cramps, eh...are you sure it's from laughing?"

(Submitted by Happyhands96)

It's like looking through you garbage and peering into your life. I like it and it makes you more interesting. Keep up the good work, I know all these other people must like this site to if they visit it so much. Take care.

(Submitted by greg)

The pink flamingoes travel west to the purple corn marsh entering into a conflict with the hairless hippo's. I THANK YOU FOR PROVIDING THIS WEB SITE FOR THE MENTALLY INSANE. I ENJOY THE READING OF YOUR COMMENTS WHILE RUBBING ONE OFF!!! VERY SOON, VERY VERY SOON WE WILL AGAIN BE VICTORIOUS IN OUR QUEST TO CONQUER THE EVIL HAIRLESS HIPPO EMPIRE!!!

(Submitted by AndreaItaly)

Its so nut that could be a new trand........(for the only reason m been here for more then 3 minutes....)

(Submitted by Phaedrus)

this is beautiful...i am so much more satisfied with the state of the world after reading these...you all have saved me...i was going to look at one last website before plunging my head through my computer moniter, thus drawing to a close my banal receptionist existance...thank you all, i can go on now

(Submitted by Zeus)

Holy smokes!

(Submitted by Someone With More Of A Life Then You It Seems)

You should get a real hobby like cracking or something.. You know removing copy protection from software... You must have alot of time on your hands or something.. Shit with all that time you could become a leet cracker and join Myth or something, Fairlight or some shit... Being a software pirate sure is a better use of internet time them posting your wal- mart sales slips.. And i thought i had no life...

(Submitted by Nathaniel)

This site reminds me of such modern artist’s creations as Warhol’s Brillo boxes and the ephemeral art of Christo. The inclusion of the user comments makes the project participatory (and somewhat aleatory, like the music of John Cage). I think this is brilliant. I’m especially intrigued by the fact that so many people post comments tinged with anger at the fact that they “wasted so much time” at this site – have they so little control over their lives that they can’t tear themselves away? Don’t they see that the mundanity is the point (as are the responses, including the angry, the disgusting, the pointless). The fact that this site exists, and that it gets such a huge response, is a comment itself on life in the world today. The “meta- message” of your site is one which would bear discussion. (And yet, I have no doubt that your only intention was to post your Wal-Mart receipts, and to see what the response might be!)

(Submitted by mama)

I am sad to see that your wife didn't breastfeed your baby. There go a few IQ points....

(Submitted by QT)

sounds like you're fond of what one might call "Scotts Soil"

(Submitted by curmbox)

This is so great. I love this site. I'm laughing so hard! I'm at work and this is a great tension breaker. This is hilarious.

(Submitted by infectious lass)

What is it with breastfeeding nazis? Why can't they grasp the concepts: 1. If someone chooses not to breastfeed its THEIR BUSINESS and no one elses 2. some people can't breastfeed for medical reasons and it does n0t mean they are deficient in IQ points 3.I was not breastfed and It didn't do me any harm whatsoever to hear the deranged screechings of the breastfeeding nazis any unbreastfed baby grows up to be a clincically depressed psychopath with every health problem known to mankind. To whitch i say BULLSHIT! 4.If i ever have a baby i will deliberately bottle feed it just to piss off the b- feeding nazis like that stupid woman above. Remember b-feeding nazism is based on fashionable faddy theories propagated by smug politically correct types and god i hate thier smug bossy guts. Poke the bossy harridanharpies in the eye! I urge you to bottlefeed all babies that you find! Do it in the name of liberty! and pissing off Smug people! I'm off to drink some cow's milk now! mmmmmmmm!

(Submitted by adolf h.)

I strongly disagree with his 3rd point. Since he was not breastfed, he is obviously deranged. Damn his mother!

(Submitted by we "N/A")

I'd like to travel under the sea...I could meet all the fish everywheere..Yes, I'd travel under the sea...but I don't think I'd like to live there...I might stay for a day there if i had my wish...but theres not much to do when your friends are all fish...And an oyster and clamaren't real family...So I don't want to live in the sea...

(Submitted by Common Sense)

Maybe people advocate breastfeeding because every single other mammal on the face of the planet does it instead of opting to synthetically produce baby-mammal formula. Maybe.

(Submitted by neb)

travis sigler rules!

(Submitted by <-§^FrReÄK^§->)

I think you should put marco right to calculating your Soil total spendage rate and soil consumption totals.

(Submitted by Travis)

So . . . ya'll aint never seen soil like I seen. And as for you breast feeding wussies, my momma gave me 100% pure goats milk and I'm smart as a munkey and healthy as a chimp.

(Submitted by AJ)

Scotts Soil is people! For God sake people, Scotts Soil is people. Ummh...Scotts Soil.

(Submitted by ecstatic )

i couldnt be breastfed cause my mom had some infection preventing it..however, my younger sister was, and i think.. judging from this experiment, one should not breastfeed their children.. nah, im just jokin. whatever ya wanna do, go for it. i hate republicans though. that is a fact. if george w. wins this election, im going to get the hell out of this country. he has nothing to stand on except *ooooooo*, what a good job his daddy did! damn republicans. cant beat 'em, can't stick 'em in a sack.. bet i erked quite a few people with this. kiss my ass.

(Submitted by BalmainBoy )

I think this site represents the organic nature of the Internet in microcosm. A personal, private quirk comes out into the open, that thousands of others can relate to in its simplicity and ubiquity. But then, the dynamic of the whole project changes into something unexpected - the audience become more entertaining than the attraction !!!

(Submitted by caroline )

so who was the maxi shield for? not you, i hope.

(Submitted by drkmater )

Why are you buying dirt?? Come to my backyard and take all you want for FREE!!!

(Submitted by SCOTT )

STOP BUYING ALL MY SOIL YOU CUNT!

(Submitted by sixfivefivethreefive )

Hrm.. a Hard*Gate like a sexy new Cisco router is more secure, but, damn, that Soft*Gate is a lot cheaper!

(Submitted by Doug in Missouri )

So, you shop in Minnesota - a civilized state, because they have no sales tax on clothing and food.

(Submitted by behanz )

Hey, did anyone else hear Derek on the call-in radio quiz show, Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me!? I have to agree with the comment about how silly the naysayers sound with their typos and mechanical errors. The impassioned breastfeeding debate is symptomatic of a culture of BIG FETUSES.

(Submitted by wal mart sucks )

save your receipts because if you try to take clothes back with out it they will only give you $3.00 back on a $15.00 pair of pants

(Submitted by i worship derek, savior of all... )

DerGodek, i have rolled down 365 different hills in three different states(total) just like you commanded. As you told me it did make me more compassionate and caring, and for this my eternal gratitude is extended even farther than it was. I am awaiting new commands. In your service forever times four, Timmy!

(Submitted by i worship derek, savior of all... )

Hi! I'm waving to hdj jewboy, Agent - XJ7, greg, infectious lass, AJ, and SCOTT. Imagine my surprise at seeing some people who don’t suck! I saw adolf h. kill himself three times, and he's back! Oh, I get it, you’re a damned cat! Hey, we "N/A"- was that ernie i just heard? page of Beauty. Timmy!

(Submitted by ang&sara )

what the hell is a maxe shield???? For your wife I assume????

(Submitted by michelle )

this is ten minutes of my life that i'll never get back!!!

(Submitted by ChickenButt )

Scott's soil is cheaper somewhere else....you got ripped off, man!

(Submitted by Casey )

This is 2 hours of my life that I'll never get back!

(Submitted by Geoff )

Never get back until I perfect my time machine....and then we'll all join in song. "Let's do the Time Warp Again!!"

(Submitted by Casey )

Even if I live for enternity, those hours would still be lost...

(Submitted by Gaspard Sanchagrin )

Nous autres aussi on en a des WAL-MARDE!!!

(Submitted by BozoandSlappy )

You are one crazy fellow for saving all of your receipts for four years, and what the heck is a maxi shield!???

(Submitted by maurice )

what is it that you've soiled?

(Submitted by AcidFresh )

Okay - this is weird. I thought I was the only one who had fun at WalMart. I do not think however that I could tolerate this website without being stoned. : )

(Submitted by 3st )

This is the revolution we have been waiting for. In the olden days, this was called a happening. Viva Derek! Viva la revolucion!

(Submitted by NYCFASHIONGIRL )

CAN WE GO SHOPPING?

(Submitted by NYCFASHIONGIRL )

LET'S GO SHOPPING!

(Submitted by We're number one! Give me a "P"! P! Go! Go! Go! P! P! P! )

I thought that was funny. Now, time to do another of my 'I buy weirder shit from wal-mart than Derek'. Ahhemm. On the night of July 10th, 2000, in the Asheville, NC Wal-Mart on Tunnel Road, I purchased 10 packs of trojan condoms, 5 candles, a plastic baseball bat, handcuffs, chain, a copy of that christina agulria CD, A DVD copy of 'Striptease" and a very large rubber ball (almost as large as me). I am not making this up. Call the Asheville Wal-Mart. Their number is (828)274-9283. Call them> And don't forget to e-mail me. It's a real e-mail. I like getting email. EMAIL ME!!! I'll pay you a dollar.

(Submitted by tony )

YOu sure the soil isn't for the marijuana plants

(Submitted by Solid Snake )

Urination Station? I think I've been there. Is it next to Stoner's Pot Palace (They sell kitchen stuff, you idiots.)?

(Submitted by We're number one! Give me a P! P! Go! Go! Go! P! P! P! )

Yes, it is. 1013 Tunnel Road, Asheville, NC, 28801. Right next to the Palace. Where you the one wearing the fatuiges and carrying a cell phone that came in and laughed untill we threw you out?

(Submitted by Solid Snake )

Yes, that was me. I also had a hidden camera, but I wasn't going to mention that. How's business at US?

(Submitted by Guy )

WAIT A MINUTE! Are you telling me you bought Maxi Pads AND potting soil on the same trip?

(Submitted by BB )

This has to be the best site I have seen since my friend's Loser Club. I have to say that I really despise people who visit websites just to put them down and then don't even have the balls to leave a name. Derek rocks, and I commend him for going out and getting that Maxi Shield. Remember, Safety First.

(Submitted by kinky )

maybe he bought the maxi to hide his joints? Here's a thought.. maybe the dri-bottoms weren't doing enough for him when he was sitting on his ass at the computer scanning in his site.. one receipt at a time.....

(Submitted by Rodney )

I thought when I found this in my search, surely this can't be what it said. It is! This is the most useless website I have ever come across. GOOD JOB!

(Submitted by Wesley Willis )

McDonalds will put pounds on you. Rock on Chicago. Rock on London. Wheaties the breakfast of champions!!!

(Submitted by Jake )

I've studied all these lists... and as a recovering crack addict - I can totally see you are a crack head. Certain odd items on your receipts are for getting fucked up. Seek help please.

(Submitted by Jackie )

Wake up dumb.......dumb all day.

(Submitted by PENNY )

DEREK... ARE YOU BUILDING A NEW PLANET WITH ALL THE SOIL???? IS THE NEW PLANET GOING TO BE CALLED WALMART!

(Submitted by BUBU )

THIS WEBSITE SUCKS !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !

(Submitted by BOBO )

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(Submitted by kraker )

It really bothers me that people asume every female can breast feed their children. If you are on medication it is not a good idea to breast feed your children.

(Submitted by Ben )

Right now I'm thinkin... "what the f**k?!"

(Submitted by 2Vamp )

i'm on my fourth receipt and oh yes, i've learnt what maxishields and breastfeedings can do for some of you lot....

(Submitted by 2vamp )

i can't believe i just posted too.

(Submitted by i am scott, derek's loyal worm from the can of worms this website opened. i live under a fresh maxi-pad every week. he's so good to me, buying me soil all the time. )

hi!

(Submitted by terrier )

For Pollack: The 0000000026 UPC# means that they couldn't find a UPC# for the product and just hand-keyed it with the 26 to keep from having to write it up.

(Submitted by lindsey )

WOW guys, he paid by check!

(Submitted by Lindsey )

Did you know that in actuality we should all pay with cash... they're computer system is better than the pentagon's and if they get your driver's license number in their system, or you credit cards, they can tell what you bought whenever they want. Trust me! I used to work there. Or, better yet, stick to KMart or Target. Check out some of the sights on employee abuse. That shit will open your eyes.. just a thought!

(Submitted by Mindless zombie )

Yes, stick with kmart or target. Because of course they don't keep records.

(Submitted by Famke )

If you all have such a problem with this website, what are you doing here then anyway? Spending your very precious time in giving useless comments and calling names to somebody you cannot see and who cannot respond.

(Submitted by becki )

You bought that stuff on my b- day!

(Submitted by MOGGEE )

Happy Birthday, becki

(Submitted by joey )

WOW

(Submitted by Nora (australia) )

I am so glad ROB cleared up what a MAXI SHIELD was, way to go ROB!!!!!!!!! I love a man who knows his MAXI SHEILDS. So, Rob, what is your views on tampons, extra absorbent?????

(Submitted by kuroneko )

people at kmart are evil. i was going there one day and i had three different cars honk at me. i was mad so i went to walmart instead.

(Submitted by Tracy )

I think it is nice. You can actually calculate probably a good part of the expense of raising a child as well as documenting growth. First the crib, then wipes and diapers and now we are onto safety supplies. It is cool.

(Submitted by Cathy )

Was it raining that day? I can barely read the receipt.

(Submitted by ;) )

i have this innane/insane urge to type something;)

(Submitted by Thalia )

hi

(Submitted by Cindy )

Where is store 1627??

(Submitted by Ricky )

People that write checks in this day and age are CLOGGING UP THE ARTERIES OF LIFE!! GET A DEBIT CARD!!!

(Submitted by Loving it! )

Hey what is wrong with Checks I love checks, leave them alone they haven't done anything to you!

(Submitted by Burke )

Fuck a bunch of receipts...i would rather read the comments!

(Submitted by Bitch )

Damn you people are funny, I wish my band (U of Colorado) had this much imagination...

(Submitted by Nathan Bush )

What is scotts soil? are you a marijuwanna planter?

(Submitted by A Breastfeeding Mommy )

I have learned from this little experiment, that NOT breastfeeding seems to produce some very angry, bitter, defensive individuals. I was not breastfed as a child either, but we have much more scientific proof of its benefits now...and no, not every mother can breastfeed...but you should not berate those who do. All mothers, whether bottlefeeding or breastfeeding, are doing what they think is best for their babies...and they are all undertaking one of the most difficult and rewarding tasks that life can offer. So don't be so negative toward either one of them. Why can't we all just get along? PS: This site is most amusing.

(Submitted by Bonnie )

This is just like archaeology - sort of.

(Submitted by katnap )

Thank you, Breastfeeding Mommy...well said. You beat me to it. Obviously some sadly pathetic and unintelligent people use any excuse to spout off about things they think their opinion is God about...Who is it that is accused of deranged screeching? (Is that the pot calling the kettle black, or what!) And Rob, where can I find a man like you? I congratulate you for your straight-forward and sincerely caring attitude towards women and their needs, and bravely posting your comment. Oh, and $2.06 does not buy a lot of soil these days folks...Nix the ideas of Derek with a backhoe or dozer. He only bought a modest bag of the stuff, probably enough to pot about 6-8 plants. At least he's treating his plants well and buying the good stuff, and not just using backyard garbage. This site is addictive...good job Derek!