Apr 1 2001

After discarding the peeled-back 'freshness seal', I dig my knife in. Twisting as I sweep the blade in a curly reverse-'S' motion, I suddenly stop, realizing what's missing.

Leaving the knife sticking out, I turn the jar so I can see the label closer.

Creamy? How'd I miss that? I dimly remember noticing that the peanut butter subsection of the "bread/mustard/pickles/Jello/Koolaid" aisle seemed to have been rearranged, but I thought nothing of it at the time.

I look into the garbage to compare labels with the empty jar, but I had already taken it out to the dumpster. I study the newly-opened jar again, knife shifting slightly as I turn it. There are whole peanuts on the outside, I think to myself, that should indicate crunchy, right? Then, I remember a problem with Gerber baby-food. Cultures who expect the images on a label to represent the contents were horribly disturbed at to see small mush-filled jars with pictures of babies on the outside.

I grasp the knife, scooping out creamy peanut butter, again noticing a lack of the grinding sound representative of crunchy peanut butter, and spread it on my toast. It still tastes the same; it's just not crunchy.